garden furniture

Do you know any games that involve interior decorating?

2011-11-19T18:47:00.001-08:00

I dunno, I'm not all into games, but I was kinda looking for one which allows you to "create" a house, or a garden or something and decorate it (choose paints, furniture and what).

Haha, sounds like the Sims already.

But any other recommendations?

Any game that fits the bill will do.

Do you know any games that involve interior decorating?
Yeah, you kind of already said it. Sims 2 is pretty much exactly what your looking for. It gives you more customization than any other game out there (unless you count real interior design programs lol).

Hope I helped=]
Reply:it is more simple than sims but animal crossing.

design your own wallpaper, carpet. lots of item collecting.

i prefer animal crossing ds
Reply:not tht i know of. I was looking for a website like tht too.

How can we stop our cat from constantly marking his territory inside the house?

2011-11-19T18:47:00.000-08:00

He sprays on bags left near ground level, furniture, the floor (we have polished boards), washing and ironing hanging on the back of chairs, in doorways, on coat stand, even on me!

We have tried shouting, “time out”, giving more attention generally (not at time of offending behaviour), medication (Endep), pheromone sprays, ammonia, citronella, but nothing seems to be discouraging him. He has two litter boxes which are cleaned regularly and a cat flap to the garden open all day!

He is a large and otherwise healthy 4-and-a-half year old neutered male “moggie”, who lives an indoor-outdoor lifestyle, is generally affectionate, very compliant with medication etc. We also have a 3 year old neutered female cat who is perfectly behaved (they get on quite well together). He has been an “inappropriate urinator” from time-to-time over the past 4 years, but the territorial marking just seems to have got far worse over the past month.

We’re at our wits’ end! Any suggestions?

How can we stop our cat from constantly marking his territory inside the house?
Oh... poor family ... and poor kitty. Well. Here is my best guess. There is a cat outside that your kitty feels threatened by. (The same thing happened with my cat)...

First...hire a professional to come and clean your furniture and carpets...one who specializes in pet odors.

Then... keep kitty indoors and away from the "threatening" cat.

In our case it was a feral cat outdoors. I bought a trap. Caught it and brought it to a no kill shelter. I kept my cat indoors all fall... all winter and in the spring let it out again.

...and in this case it was problem solved.

However... in any case my guess is that your cat feels threatened and needs to say to all involved "This is mine!"

Good luck! I know it's a tuff problem and wears on your nerves! Best to you and kitty!
Reply:It sounds like there is another male in the house threatening his territory. Otherwise, this could also be a reaction to another environmental stressor such as anger that your schedule keeps you away longer hours, or that you have changed the way you treat him. Remember that marking is instinctive, and requires a trigger. Once you identify the trigger, you can adapt the environment so that it is no longer tirggered.

On a side note, SHOUTING, and time out might work on humans, but this is not a baby, it is an ANIMAL. You need to communicate with it and react to it in a manner it can understand. And Cats have never taken to obedience training as well as dogs.
Reply:You can get produscts from pet supply shops to deter them. But otherwise, i'm not sure.

Good Luck
Reply:I had a dog like that. And the vet put him on some kind of medication for a couple months to curb the instinct and it worked. He didn't do it after that. So I would imagine they have something similar for cats? There are some natural things, like orange juice scents, etc, which I'm sure would come up if you google it. Something is making him insecure is all I can think of. What does the vet attribute it to? Good luck dear.

ps. Now that I've had a chance to read the answers, I think Chrissy's right; that may very well be the source of what is causing the insecurity and the constant marking.
Reply:Wolf urine.
Reply:we had this problem with a couple of our cats bring them to the spot before cleaning it rub thier nose in it swat them or spray them with watter or both lol. we had one cat that wouldnt stop so my mom filled up a 3 gallon bucket and dumped it on the cat lol, never sprayed again
Reply:Male cats SPRAY. if there neautred before the age of 6months, they shouldn't spray, if there neautred over 6month he will still spray.

Female can spray, but is not likely.when there desexed it been spayed!

I never had a female cat that sprays!

http://www.catsofaustralia.com/cat-spray...
Reply:Territory marking is often a cry for help when a cat is feeling insecure. It's a way of signalling to others "keep out" or "I have a right to be here".

Try to think back over the past month or so, to any event that your cat may have found stressful. This could be an unpleasant encounter outside with another cat, or it could be something less obvious like decorating or new furniture within the home. Cats are creatures of habit, and changes that seem insignificant to us, can be a huge deal to them. If you can establish the cause of his anxiety and then remove or alleviate it, you are halfway to solving the problem.

The web article below offers more advice on why cats begin spraying and how to treat the problem.

http://www.celiahaddon.co.uk/pet%20probl...

You also need to thoroughly clean any areas where he has sprayed or urinated to help break the habit. As long as he can detect his own scent there, he will be attracted to "top-up" every time the smell begins to fade. Cat urine contains ammonia, so avoid products containing it. (To him it will just smell like another cat has marked there, causing him to over-mark it with his own scent.) The web article below has lot of cleaning advice that should help.

http://www.celiahaddon.co.uk/pet%20probl...
Reply:get a spray called kitty of spray at petsmart or petco
Reply:I had a female do that and I cleaned it up with vinger and lemon juice and I haven't had a problem since.
Reply:It's a very VERY stubborn cat. He also sounds like her hasn't been neutered. They will calm down and be less territorial if they are neuterted. It doesn't cost much. I only charge $40.

If this continues, you can give him (not too hard) a nice, uncomfortable swat on the BEHIND. Lol.

Nintendo Wii

Gardens!!!!!?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.009-08:00

Im looking to do up my garden, i live in the uk, scotland, glasgow! where is the cheapest place for garden furniture and slabs etc! thanx

Gardens!!!!!?
hi

have you tried freecycle.org

you have to choose a group to join in your surrounding area, then browse people are often recycling lots of items all you have to do is arrange pick up.

its cool and its free and green!!!!

Yippee
Reply:Try the garden factory online. JW Grants in maryhill is the cheapest i know for slabs and gravel but that might well be because i am a landscaper and get trade prices but you could try, Failing that your local B%26amp;Q may be cheaper as they buy in bulk and sell stuff of cheap in the winter to make way for the christmas stock.
Reply:Argos %26amp;Woolworths have some good offers on line for garden furniture.
Reply:The cheapest place in Glasgow is probably B%26amp;Q, the Darnley store has the best selection of materials, it would be worth trying Travis perkins as well they have been known to be quite cheap, they are always trying to compete with B%26amp;Q.

Good luck.

How can we stop our cat from constantly marking his territory inside the house?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.008-08:00

Ireally love looking at furniture photos and ilove ikea..so does anyone here knows a good site for free pics??

2011-11-19T18:46:00.007-08:00

u know free pics to look at homes,gardens,pools and stuff plzz im an addict

Ireally love looking at furniture photos and ilove ikea..so does anyone here knows a good site for free pics??
Ikea publishes and sends out a catalog.

J C Penney company also publishes and sends out a catalog.

How can I dispose of old cutlery safely?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.006-08:00

I have recently been completely refurbishing my home. I have managed to sell old furniture and carpets etc in newspapers and online, and most other things have gone for re-cycling. Now; the kitchen! All of my old crockery, casserole dishes etc, I have smashed into small pieces, ready to use as drainage in plantpots in the garden....so, most of the stuff has been disposed of in an eco-friendly way. My problem now is, how do I dispose of old cutlery, particularly things like carving knives, bread knives etc safely?

How can I dispose of old cutlery safely?
Hi, you sound really busy and good on you for not just dumping it. Charity shops will be more than happy to take them or a scrap metal dealer, art college, I've seem some amazing mobiles made from twisted and bent cutlery
Reply:I can understand not wanting carving knives etc to end up in the wrong hands, but the fact is that these are widely available, and anyone intent on getting their hands on one for the wrong reasons can walk into almost any shop and buy what is needed.

That said. almost everyone will use them responsibly. I would concurr with what has been said above, or car boot sales etc.
Reply:Take it to your local charity shop, they would be glad to have it.
Reply:How about putting it on your local Freecycle group? Someone out there might be able to get a few more years use out of them!
Reply:I donate to groups like Goodwill, Recycling Matters, Canadian Diabetes, Ontario Federation for Cerebral Palsy. They sell the items themselves or to thrift shops. You must have organizations in your area which can benefit, too.

The Muse :)

DOG

How was Roman housing similar to our home today and how did it differ?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.005-08:00

The lower class Romans (plebeians) lived in apartment houses, called flats, above or behind their shops. Even tradesmen might have chosen to live in an apartment-building compound over their store, with maybe renters on the upper stories. Their own apartments might be quite roomy, sanitary and pleasant, occasionally with running water. But others were not that nice.

In the flats an entire family (grandparents, parents, children) might all be crowded into one room, without running water. They had to haul their water in from public facilities. Fire was a very real threat because people were cooking meals in crowded quarters, and many of the flats were made of wood. They didn't have toilets in the flat so they had to use public ones.

The upper class Romans (patricians) lived in single family homes, which in Ancient Rome meant the great grandparents, grandparents, parents, and kids of one family lived in a home together. Homes were made, quite often, of brick with red tile roofs, with rooms arranged around a central courtyard.

The windows and balconies faced the courtyard, not the street, to keep homes safe from burglars. There were paintings on the walls and beautiful mosaics on the floor. There was very little furniture, and no carpeting. Wealthy Romans might have a house with a front door, bedrooms, an office, a kitchen, a dining room, a garden, a temple, an atrium, a toilet, and a private bath.

How was Roman housing similar to our home today and how did it differ?
Roman housing was similar to our houses today because they had a kitchen, bedrooms, a front door, an office, and a dining room. However, nowadays most people have carpeting in their homes and don’t have mosaics on the floor. Nearly all of us probably have more furniture in our homes than the Ancient Romans. Also, almost all homes now have running water and a toilet, while in Rome, only the wealthy Romans did. Another major difference is that now all homes have advanced technology (computer, television) and in Ancient Rome that was unheard of.

Does a man have a right to keep a goat?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.004-08:00

i rent a house to a man, and his goat has been chewing the furniture (mine) and also destroying the lawn and garden. he keeps it in the kitchen pantry, and that's now a mess. i know a man has a right to keep a goat, if he wants to keep a goat, but isn't this just goin' too dang far?

Does a man have a right to keep a goat?
I don't know, but how is the weather in Kentucky?
Reply:If he lives in a city than I dont think he can have a goat. Since you rent the house to the man you could tell him to rid of his goat or you kick him out.
Reply:You're the landlord? I think you should tighten the rules on having pets in the space he is renting. Let him know that there will be fines for any damages the animal makes so that you can replace and fix the place up after he leaves.
Reply:You would have to check with your city and /or town regulations. Some do not allow people to keep what is considered farm animals as pets. Also sometimes they require that the animal has certain living requirements such as a large yard or a pen, not an indoor pantry. You could also try checking with your local animal control officer.
Reply:I doubt that you can do a lot about it except evict him.

If you did not stipulate NO PETS or pets by approval you are not entitled to dictate that he cannot keep the goat.

Take pictures of the damage and take out a writ for damages done by this animal. There is also a health issue you can pursue
Reply:U cud always charge extra rent for the goat!
Reply:run him and his hairy friend off
Reply:Well, If he is married another hard headed stinking *** around shouldn't matter.
Reply:In a large or even just a big city, I doubt it would be legal to keep a goat.

Do you have a pets / no pets policy for your rental property? I mean there are some apartment and even house rental property advertised out here in rural N.E. Texas that plainly state in the ad "No Pets!"

Even if you do allow pets you should still be able to charge him for damage to your property. That or just tell him he won't be getting his deposit back.
Reply:I think he's got your goat. Contact the city about the farm animal and start eviction proceedings. Also small clames court to recover damages.
Reply:I'm a lawyer and just tried a case identical to this. There is absolutely nothing whatsoever you can do about it. The judge said unless the goat is dangerous or harmful to the owner, he has a right to keep the goat anywhere on the premises. It's a dang shame I say.
Reply:it is your house

tell him to loose the goat
Reply:he has right to keep goat until he can prevent it from destroying.
Reply:If it is your house and you are renting it to him, you can set rules about pets

Gardens!!!!!?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.003-08:00

Im looking to do up my garden, i live in the uk, scotland, glasgow! where is the cheapest place for garden furniture and slabs etc! thanx

Gardens!!!!!?
I know that Tesco in Milngavie (Glasgow) has money off there garden furniture just now I got mine from there 3 years ago and it lasted great. There is a builders merchant in Kirkintilloch (McNairs) who's prices are OK for slabs, fencing etc.
Reply:Builder base is the cheapest or other builders merchants.

This type of materials are expensive from a garden place
Reply:Join uk.freecycle.org for your local area. You can pick up loads of weird stuff completely for free. I've seen garden furniture and slabs on my local site in the last month.

Ebay's a great place to start browsing, and you might just snap up a bargain. Check prices against B%26amp;Q etc though to make sure you aren't paying over the odds.

Best of luck! I'm 2 years on from where you are now, so know how it feels starting from scratch. I'm very smug as I just got 10 enormous planters free from a local nursery through freecycle!
Reply:Try a local Internet search
Reply:Best places are B%26amp;Q, Homebase or Focus and there is bound to be at least one of those near you. My favourite for garden stuff is probably B%26amp;Q. You could also try specialist garden centres like Dobbies (which has branches all over Scotland) or a local independent garden centre.

What is the best website to help choose the right dog for me?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.002-08:00

Ive tried a couple, but want to know what people think the best one is.

It is for my 10 year old son, my wife who likes going out running and me who is a bit of a couch potato.

We like to go away a bit, and have a detatched house with a 30 metre square garden, in a small town.

I work quite long hours, and my wife starts university in september so the dog would be in at home during school hours most days.

It is my son who is mad keen. He's an only child and would like the company. I'm not a huge fan of dogs - largely because I dont want a smelly house, or hairs on the furniture (I prefer cats, but my son's best friend comes around a lot and he's alergic to cats!). Want something affectionate, not agressive and not too small.

Wayafink?

What is the best website to help choose the right dog for me?
http://aolsvc.decisionguides.aol.com/dog...

http://www.pedigree.com/community/select...

http://www3.dogbreedinfo.com/search.htm

I liked these. Some of the other responders have also given you good advice.

By they way, Spuds MacKenzie wasn't a Beagle, it was a Bull Terrier !!!! :) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spuds_MacKe...

Before you get a dog you need to open your heart to it. It is at the least a 10 year commitment, and hopefully for you and your family, much longer. Sit down and talk with your family. Make sure this is a commitment you are all ready to make.

From the way you write, I would guess you are in the UK or Canada. Why not a Cavalier King Charles? They are very devoted and quiet animals when you only have one. Get a bunch of them and they are just spaniels. They are considered a toy breed, but they are more moderate in size.

Whatever your decision, make sure that you research your selected breed well. They all have health problems, but you can minimize your risk of getting a dog that is affected.

Email me if you chose a toy breed if you like. I would be glad to help you look for a quality animal (no petshop please!)

I work with the Cavalier, Shih tzu, Japanese Chin, Chihuahua, and also have a French Bulldog of my own. I would recomend a Frenchie to anyone other than they have terrible health issues. I love him so much and he is so cool, great with everyone (clown) especially kids, but I won't have him nearly long enough.

Best wishes.
Reply:by yr intellectual get a fish for yourself.......if you want to familize..get a vacume cleaner and have fun cleaning house...because that comes with any living organism............any dog will do fine and help all of you...............i know they can help heal a broken heart
Reply:Well, dogs don't "smell" any worse than a cat. Dogs don't shed any worse than a cat. As long as YOU are working to keep your home clean, vacuuming the furniture, ETC, you won't have a problem.

Since the dog will be left alone all-day, I definitely don't suggest any Herding breed (Border Collie, German Shepherd, Australian Shepherd, ETC) as they become bored and destructive, because they were bred to do a job.

Since you have said not too small, let's rule out anything from the Toy Group.

How do you feel about Terriers and giant breeds? How do you feel about grooming?
Reply:Here are some nice links for you to look at:

http://www.infopet.co.uk/pages/0110.html

http://www.hsus.org/pets/pet_care/select...

http://www.saferpets.co.uk/ChoosingSafeP...

http://www.healthyfoodforpets.com/how-to...
Reply:The Bostone Terrier is the breed for you. They don't shed at all and they are very loving. Here are some websites about them. I hope this helps.

http://www.k9web.com/dog-faqs/breeds/bos...

http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/bostonterrie...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_Terr...

http://www.akc.org/breeds/boston_terrier...
Reply:This is a good website with lots of information.

http://animal.discovery.com/guides/dogs/...

However, you should consider if you really really want a dog, and I'm referring to the whole family, not only your son because at 10 years old kids change interests and priorities frequently and you and your wife may end up being the responsibles of the dog after your son's fad for the new puppy has fade. A high percent of animals abandoned in shelter were adquired by families just to give their children another gift. A dog is made of flesh and bones, it's not a toy.
Reply:You sound as if you do not really want a dog in the house and that you do not have much time for one. At 10, your son cannot take care of a dog on his own and, like all kids, probably has a short attention span and may soon move onto something else.

Perhaps you can try being a foster home for a local shelter or rescue group. That would give you experience with a number of different dogs and breeds before you settle on a dog of your own.

As for cats, some people are only mildly allergic and will do fine in a house with cats as long as there is a room (say, your son's) that is cat-free. Some are fine as long as they do not touch the cat.

With your schedules, perhaps a cat would be an easier choice.
Reply:If you don't like the smell, get an outdoor dog. If its mainly for your son then you'll want a friendly dog. Golden retrevers seem to be good with kids.
Reply:I think you don't want a dog - wait until you do.
Reply:I wouldn't suggest checking a website to find the right dog, because they tend to be biased towards the dogs that they want to sell. I would say to go to an adoption center at a Petsmart or Petco, or to a kennel, and take a look at some of the dogs. When you see what kind you like, find out what breed it is and then do some research about it online.

For your son I would suggest a Beagal(Spud McKinsey, Wishbone), they are not to small and not to big, high on energy and very loyal and commpasionate. Also he might like the Boston Terrier, for the same reasons listed for the Beagal.

running shoes

What can I replace a shed with underneath a willow tree?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.001-08:00

I want to get rid of a 6" x 4" shed that is currently stood on a concrete base, partly underneath a willow tree in my garden. Anyone know what i can put in its place? Maybe stand alone plants or furniture or something? I don't want to get rid of the concrete base.

What can I replace a shed with underneath a willow tree?
A nice picnic table and maybe some outdoor lounge chairs.

making it a nice family gathering place on nice days.
Reply:make it a cook out center,
Reply:a bench
Reply:Bird bath in the center with large containers of shade flowers or green plants sitting around the bath.

A pretty garden statue.

Patio furniture.

Garden art: Paint it with bright colorful cement paint. Maybe a pattern.

Stopping a cat scratching furniture?

2011-11-19T18:46:00.000-08:00

my cat is lovely, except for her scratching. she's destroyed one sofa, and is on the way to destroying a second, as well as the stairs, and a chair...

she has a scratching post, ignores it, even if i put catnip spray on it.

we've put towels over the offending areas, she moves them aside to scratch.

we stomp and shout if we hear her doing it.

shes even pushed my dad out the way, sat on his feet, and scratched the stairs.

my dad wants to throw out the second sofa and get a leather one, does anyone know if she'll destroy that too? the stairs aren't so bad as it's old carpet and will one day be replaced, but any tips?

i want to try citronella, but i'm worried it will stain.

the cat is approx 8 years old, she was a rescue we got when she was 5-6 years old. i do NOT believe in declawing, and she has the freedom to go outside when ever she wants. (shes shredded a fence post in the garden too...) i don't live with her, i live in the city, but i want to help my dad out!

Stopping a cat scratching furniture?
If she hates the spraying noise, then chasing her off with a plant spray or squirt gun will work well! She won't ignore that, likely. Also cover the couch with alu foil or doublesided tape, she wouldn't care about a towel but she probably won't like the foil or tape.

If you're in the UK you won't even be able to declaw, which is a good thing 'cause I fully agree with you that is a cruel thing to do! But still take a look at the anti-declawing site in the source, it has an extensive article on why cats scratch and how to get them to scratch in the correct places (and leave all those other places alone).
Reply:clip her nails de nail the cat at the vet
Reply:try putting a old tree limb by the area she is scratching. I found using a sprizer bottle with vinegar and water and spraying in face helpful. Only use small amount of vinegar just for he smell. good luck
Reply:She will definitely enjoy scratching the leather sofa too. Declawing is definitely wrong, but trimming the end of her claws with a nail clkipper may help.

Also, go to www.softpaws.com. They sell some nail caps, easy to use, cheap, and no problem for the cat (you can remove them whenever you want too).
Reply:Place covers over the areas, they sell plastic covers, it will protect the furniture, but it probably won't look as snazzy. Then work on fixing the problem, by spraying to punish bad behavior.
Reply:I have dealt with shredder cats before. This is not just a bad habit. Your cat is scratching to mark territory. This is why she doesn't scratch the post.

Almost all animals have territorial behaviors. We have 6 cats and a couple scratched the furniture, a couple spray different things around the house and a couple will aggressively chase off any of the other entering their domain.

For cats that spray or scratch, all you need is a little cyan pepper. if you sprinkle a little cyan pepper on the stair where she is scratching a few time a week for two weeks she wont scratch that area.

On furniture, put two teaspoons of cyan pepper in a nylon stocking. Use the bag a couple times a week to treat the area of the furniture where she scratches. She won't like it and this won't curb the urge she has to scratch, but it will eventually encourage her to scratch on the post.
Reply:Cpinatsi has got it, Softpaws are the way to go. They are small hollow shells of rubbery plastic that cover the nail and are held on by a drop of super glue. The cat cat go about her normal business climbing up fences or scratching at the couch, but no damage can be done as the claws are effectively blunted. I worked at an animal clinic and applied these by the hundreds. Theyre about $20 for a six month supply at most pet stores, or your vet proabably has a supply and would be willing to walk you through it the first time. In a package you usually get about 4-5 sets, as the cats nails grow the shells fall off and you stick on new ones, theyre painless, nontoxic and harmless if ingested.
Reply:Try talking to the vet, they make small plastic covers that slide over each claw and are permanently attached. It doesn't hurt the cat and protects the house from clawing. I've never used them, but I think the vet has to put them on and they have to be redone every so often, but would be worth looking into.
Reply:Get your cat a scratching post.

They have them at Pet Co. for like $25.00. Show your cat where they should scratch or get them declawed.

How do you get rid of cats, without hurting them?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.008-08:00

They do their business on my porch, they burrow in my garden, they stalk my bird's nest, they sleep on my patio furniture. I've tried mothballs and cayenne pepper, to no avail.

How do you get rid of cats, without hurting them?
Cats hate the smell of ammonia. Put an ammonia soaked rag in a tupperware container (with holes so the scent can escape) on your porch, the foul scent should drive them away, it worked for me around my bird feeders.
Reply:Lots of local shelters will have cat traps you can borrow. Trap them, call the animal control officer, and they're gone.
Reply:Try this recipe: 2 Tbsp. Cayenne pepper, 3 Tbsp. powdered Chinese Mustard, 4 Tbsp. Flour in 2 quarts of warm water.. Allow it to stand for 1 hr and then strain and put it in a spray bottle, and, spray it around. This will repel a mountain lion as well. Cats also hate the smell of Vinegar. So use it in a spray bottle . Cats are afraid of Snakes so place pieces of garden hose about your garden. Cats do not like to see their reflection in a plastic bottle. Try filling plastic soda bottles half full of water and leave them around your garden where they frequent. They will go looking for another place to use as a bathroom. if you plant Chicken Wire just under the surface of the some of the soil around the garden, the cats will have too much trouble digging and find an easier area. Plant Catnip in a place far away from the areas you want to keep them away from. Cats do not like the herb "Rue", so scatter the leaves around the areas that they frequent and they will leave very quickly. Or plant some "Rue " plants.
Reply:Cat-A-Pult %26lt;----- evil laugh

Or you might try ammonia in a small bowls around the patio.

¬¿¬
Reply:are they strays? if so, call animal control
Reply:be careful they sometimes get extremely insane and once they touch u they will not stop until u throw them
Reply:Spray them with water whenever they do anything wrong
Reply:Call Animal Control.
Reply:Ammonia, or spray them with a hose, or call animal control, ONLY if they are no kill. They dont deserve to die, simply because they are a nuisense! :)
Reply:Well, first try contacting your local Animal Control. They can set up humane traps to remove them.

Or, you can purchase traps yourself and then take them to a local animal shelter.

But, be aware. A mad cat is a very dangerous animal! They are lightning quick and not only bite, but scratch. They also thrash violently when scared. You can also call a private Animal removal company.
Reply:try some citrus scented air freshener and spray your furniture.

You can always get a humane trap and trap them and call the shelter for pick up.
Reply:Ammonia, or a dog.
Reply:Animal Control

Ur Not Hurting them.

They may even be fed in the shelter.
Reply:spray them with the hose and soon they wont come back.

Whats better Jungle cat or Garden for Kitty?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.007-08:00

If you were going to leave your kitty at a boarding facility, what "setting" would you think was cuter or funer for the cat? ** Jungle Room** a room with green walls,fake plants , cat nip and toys with leopard print cat furniture and what not or **Garden kitty** fake hanging plants, flowers and butterflies on the wall and light colored items in the room ? Both rooms would have the identical toys, furniture ect..

Whats better Jungle cat or Garden for Kitty?
Jungle - there is more visually stimulating stuff you can use, IMO.
Reply:Neither of these would appeal to me or my cat who is very timid. I would look for a cattery that had a caring owner who would cuddle and cosset my cat as much as possible and have a warm environment for her so that she did not miss her home comforts.
Reply:garden kitty!
Reply:I would pick jungle.

Help for melasma

Question about the BED frame / furniture ?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.006-08:00

I've never bought a bed myself and I'm not very knowledgeable about it, but I felt this bed looked all right (see link below). If I get a "full size" of this bed, would it be okay for someone who is around 5'10" tall? If not what size would be good enough?

Also, what does "unfinished" mean? Does it have to be finished in order to use it properly or not? Where can I get it done at?

http://www.amazon.com/Solid-Wood-Platfor...

Question about the BED frame / furniture ?
unfinished means the wood is ready for staining and lacquer.

If you do not wish to finish the wood I would at least put lenn seed

oil on it. Beware the bed may not be assembled when it arrives.

Ask the sender to to give you a list of items included. (does it come with a mattress)

A full size bed should be ok for a 6 foot person.

Woodwork hobbies and instructions?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.005-08:00

for making rabbit hutches and garden furniture etc

Woodwork hobbies and instructions?
try www.dyi.com or www.hgtv.com

Ideas for a garden theme!!?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.004-08:00

I want to redecorate a TV room with a southernly garden feel. Lots of sunflowers, color, and plants involved. Any ideas for furniture and decoration :)??

Ideas for a garden theme!!?
Instead of a chair rail around the room, why not put up a 3 ft. high white picket fence around the room or at least on one wall with a tree and flowers painted beyond the fence and maybe a swing hanging from the tree. You can have some nice silk flowers poking through the fence. For room furniture use outdoor furnishings like wicker. Maybe even a hammock could be hung from two tree's painted on opposite walls in the room.
Reply:Garden style is typified by an atmosphere of fresh and pretty things, including floral prints, especially in chintz fabrics, needlepoint pillows, framed botanicals, painted wood furniture, lace accents, fresh flowers and china antiques.

THINK OUTDOOR: sky, trees, flowers, grass, stones and water. Ever thought of adding water mini water fountain? Paint "stone pathway"? Stencil a tree on one wall? Build a birdhouse serve as a lamp?

IDEAS:

Mix new and old, washed white and dark wooded furnitures, pictures, etc

http://img.hgtv.com/HGTV/2003/07/22/desi...

Wheelbarrow serve as TV stand

Add birdcage and hang with a rope on the ceiling

Add picket fence on one wall OR stencil it (if you know how)

http://img.hgtv.com/HGTV/2004/03/05/cott...

Add mirror on the opposite side of the window to bring "outdoor" indoor

Set up a long rectangle table the back of your couch with bunches of plants, birdhouses, sunflowers, etc

Hang framed leaves from your backyard http://img.hgtv.com/HGTV/2003/02/19/dws1...

Add sunflower printed throw blanket on the end of couch

Add solid white or pale yellow sheer curtains under large printed sunflower valances. Be sure to add hooks with silk sunflowers attached

A bench from picnic table serve as coffee table
Reply:i wouldn't go to floral pattern crazy with the furniture cause that can look outdated. i would go with a light green colour for the walls, u can still put sunflowers on them if u want.
Reply:Paint the room "queen anne lilac" by sherwin williams.

http://sherlink.sherwin.com/swapp/color_...

Lay down a floral area rug:

http://www.homedecorators.com/Rugs/style... many pretty ones, but I think I like the Pansies Rug the best for your theme:

http://www.homedecorators.com/P/Pansies_...

You could hang pictures of flowers (love the "Peonies and Delphinium" by Janet Walsh):

http://homedecorators30.artselect.com/se...

Or of gardens:

http://homedecorators30.artselect.com/se...

As for furnishings, I would get a wicker patio set with colorful seat cushions:

http://www.homedecorators.com/P/El_Grand...

http://www.homedecorators.com/newThumbPa...

Why won't my 2 year old stop jumping on my furniture?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.003-08:00

I've tried several times to stop him from jumping on the sofa, but he seems to love going back to iy and have a jump. We have a trrampoline in the garden, which he loves. Why won't he stop when I tell him to

Why won't my 2 year old stop jumping on my furniture?
He's a child and is testing his limits--Just keep telling him to stop--don't get angry or abusive in any way--just keep telling him to stop--perhaps lifting him from the sofa--and putting him somewhere else each time..eventually he wil get it--He is testing your limits--if you react with anger--he will have learned how to provoke you. If you continue to set limits calmly--he will learn to respect you--that what you say is what you mean--consistently--

that said--maybe he needs to work off more energy--take him to the outdoor trampoline more--and have more interesting things to do in the house as well..kids llike to play and explore..it's natural...
Reply:He's 2 and that's just how boys are always have to push their luck. give him a warning and if he does it again then put him in time out for 2 min. and if that doesn't work put him in his bed or just his room for a few min. he should understand that you're not joking when you say no.
Reply:he is CUTE
Reply:thats why its called terrible twos. get a lock for his bedroom, put him in it when he dis obeys, right away so he can see why. let him out AFTER he stops crying. He needs to learn to listen.
Reply:You are just gonna have to keep on telling him over and over again....eventually he will get the message.

When you have removed him from the sofa, get down to his level, look him in eye and, with a deep and serious voice, say " you dont jump on the sofa, a sofa is for sitting on, not jumping".....and then take him out of the room..i would also try distraction.....get him interested in something else when he wants to jump on the sofa.
Reply:Tell him he's not allowed on the furniture period. Make him sit on the floor and tell him that he can try again tomorrow or after his nap or something.
Reply:And why he should care for your furniture. With his lovely jumps, chinky jumps, smiling jumps he is offering you a lot of happiness, if he stops this activity for 24 hrs , you will certainly feel whether he got ill, and you will pray God that you will never prevent him , but please give all his smiles and jump back . This is nature.
Reply:Because he loves jumping on the sofa!

You need to reinforce your telling by doing:

Take him out and put him on the trampoline. Tell him the trampoline is for jumping and the sofa is for sitting.

Make him SIT on the sofa - and if he won't, give him a warning: the next jumping on the sofa will get you a time out.
Reply:my son does the same exact thing. he loves to jump all over the place on everything, onto everything. September he broke his arm...last friday, fractured his leg. Jumping from the dresser to the bed - onto a pile of clothes. I warned him and warned him, sat him on time out, did all i could. i get told its a boy thing. wild arnt they!?
Reply:Could be that he's doing it for attention. Be sure to give him the attention he craves when he's being good- ignore him when he's being naughty. Kids hate to be ignored. Of course if he is really pushing his luck you could use Time out, but when disciplining him get down to his level and tell him why he is naughty and get him to say sorry. Good luck!
Reply:he thinks hes tigger hey! i would say time out he has to know now other wise can you imagine when he is 16 and doing it..mmmmm no time out for 2 min a min per year of age.when its time up you get to his leval and say mummy does not want you to do that again. after he say sorry. let him go if it happens again do the same thing, ill be truthful it will take about a week and probably wear you out. but remember YOU are the boss.good luck to you and tigger...
Reply:Some pretty harsh answers for disciplining a two year old!

I have a two year old boy and he is crazy!

I wish all he did was jump on the furnature!

Locking him in his room until he stops crying will only break his temper and his emotional ability will begin to decrease, not a good idea unless you want a heartless child.

Two year olds do this kind of thing, for attention, boredom, or just to be plain naughty! I promise he WILL grow out of it.

I've shouted at mine til I'm blue in the face and trust me they still do it, it will stop eventually try ignoring him and he'll get bored of it himself.
Reply:if he doesn't stop when you tell him to, put him in time out, he needs to know that there are consequences for not listening to you.
Reply:Get him into a trampolining class that has lessons three or four times a week. He will:

a) get good at bouncing and be able to use his own trampoline in better ways

b) have no time to bounce on your sofa

Alternatively you could get a sofa with really strong springs.

Also, two year olds don't do what you say! He's only a kid!

riding boots

Can any one give me feedback on the products of this company?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.002-08:00

the site http://www.gadwood.com/index1.html and if u know similar comapanies doing garden furniture with the same desgins

thanks

Can any one give me feedback on the products of this company?
You are looking for garden furniture.

(consider that wood garden furniture will need constant maintenance)

Check here:

http://www.yellowpages.com/

http://theyellowpages.com/index.php...

http://www.yellow.com/

http://www.yp.com/

http://m.yp.com/

http://www.onlineyellowpages.com/

http://www.fundraising-yellow-pages.com/

http://www.b2byellowpages.com/

http://www.yellowpages.com/sp/maps/;jses...

What color should I paint my living and dining rooms?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.001-08:00

I just bought new furniture and was wondering what color to use for the walls. This is the couch:

http://www.furniturexo.com/Garden-Grove-...

and this is the dining room set:

http://www.furniturexo.com/images/D423-3...

Any ideas? (Specific color names would be appreciated)

What color should I paint my living and dining rooms?
Pale gold would be great, or caramel.
Reply:A cream yellow (more Cream then Yellow) would work, and paint the base boards (if they are painted if not work with the wood you have.) a deeper cream yellow or a pure white. Go to the paint store and bring home samples of all the cream yellows all the company's make to find your shade.
Reply:A color similar to the wall color in the picture of the kitchen would go very nice in your combo living space.

One suggestion is Sherwin Williams "Jonquil".

Both spaces will have a lot of activity, so try to keep in warm and invigorating.

Have fun with the decorating.

P.S. The dinette is beautiful!
Reply:for the couch... Go for Cinnamon.

For the Dining Room... Salmon.
Reply:i think the name of the green that will go wih the dining room set is called summer rain as for the sofa i dont have a clue
Reply:Nice choices! I would do a honey gold or a khaki

paint, and blue accents. Depending on the floor plan, I

would paint the rooms the same color. In my mom's house, the LR?DR is an "L" shape, so she uses the same color.

My house has 2 rooms side, by side. My LR is solid honey color, and the DR is same color as LR below the chair rail molding, and one shade lighter above. My trim is cream, like your DR furniture.
Reply:light green
Reply:sage green works well with maroon. as for your dining, sage green will meld with the green tones of your chairs. or you can also play with shades of yellow and orange. check out sherwin williams.com for sprout for your living room and koi pond for your dining
Reply:the living room

would be very cool if u paint it in a nice cosey crimson color

u know u can bring those bars with colors in it

put it on the wall

and compare

and for the dinning room

i guess the colors in the picture r way too nice

and u know what would go really good too

baby blue with light or hot yellow

they will do really good

the couch is really nice

and so is the dinning room

:)

u have a very nice taste

enjoy them

My neighbour has part of my garden...?

2011-11-19T18:45:00.000-08:00

my door is at the side of my house, and theres a fence that runs one metre in front of it, at the side of that fence is my neighbours kitchen window, That has 3 METRES , i cannot get a pram into my house and have great differcultly movin furniture in and out,

i know that this is a health and safety issue, and i have been told by council workers that the fence needs to move further back, allowing me to gain full accsess to my property, and also it will give me another 1.5 metres of garden that goes all the way down,

my neighbour has just recently bought her home, and has made other residents move their boundrys back to the correct places. the issue of the fence was raised when she actually thought i had her land, and when we looked at the council boundry map, she had MINE! and then a week later the boundry line had been CHANGED to suit her, AS SHE SHOUTS THE LOUDEST! the council are a waste of time, what should i do?

My neighbour has part of my garden...?
Weather you own or not, councils tenants have the same rights as "homeowners". If you are a tenant, you need to go to the council and get a copy of the original bounderies, and see if there is any way they can help. If not then go to the C.A.B and get proper legal advise ( bringing up the "Health %26amp; Safety" issues). See how loud you can shout. What makes her so special.Her S*it still stinks!!!!!! You could threaten to sue if you hurt yourself, trying to get your pram in! Good luck
Reply:she couldn't possibly get the boundary changed within a week go to th council and ask to see the planning file on her property and yours look up the land registry files to see the defining boundarys whatever itn says on these is true. you can get copies to show her if she doesn't believe you. your local council has to have the files and it doesn't cost anything to see them
Reply:I bought a piece of property at auction for a rental house, but didn't bargain for the next door neighbor. As soon as the "sold" came from the auctioneer, she was in my face. She was yelling at me that my house was sitting on her property and she wanted it moved, as she had tried to get the previous owners to do. I went to the city and found the maps. What I found was that my house was not on her property, but the down spouts coming off the house were. My next step was to hire a survey crew to stake the exact placement of my property line. There is now a lovely fence dividing the property. She still yells, but I know I'm right. The city can not change the property lines, they are plainly listed in your property deed. Surveying isn't the cheapest, but sometimes it is the only way.
Reply:damn what a b**** she is what you need to do is fight for your property and not let her have her way
Reply:learn to shout louder

stand your ground

continue approuching the council and be firm

if that doesnt work flatten her tires
Reply:I don't know. Does your neighbor have part of your garden? I don't understand the question.
Reply:Have the plat surveyed and boundaries made clear. Make her move the fence if it's on your side!!
Reply:If you were in states you could take her to Judge judy's court.
Reply:Is this a council house? If yes, and you cannot get any sense from the town hall, the next step is your local councillor, after that your MP, after all that is what they are paid for.
Reply:Oh no you should see the council and appeal it because the original boundary map says its yours , you should keep it and the council should notify you if you dint agree with the decision when the neighbor approached them. get the council to reconsider better yet demand them to reconsider.

Home and Garden Question?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.006-08:00

What are the decorating trends this year/or season for a home? What room scents are the most popular, candles, incense, etc. What flowers are popular for Fall and Winter(store bought of course)? What colors are in as far as wall color and general room color of the furniture to the decorations? I am oblivious when it comes to designing and decorating I could use a little bit of help please. Thanks! =)

Home and Garden Question?
Freaks who invent 'trends' don't have to live in your house. Design it to how you like it, to hell with anyone else
Reply:trends dont matter its what u like thats important!! its autumn so id go with spicy apple candles. in my home each room has its own theme. the living room is southwestern, the den is victorian, the kitchen italian the bathroom a beachhouseand my bedroom an island paradise flowrs mums are out right now and roses never go out of style
Reply:did you see this?

family nanny

I am looking for reclaimed roof tiles or slates, in the 53500 area of france?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.005-08:00

can anyone help with reclaimed sales in 53500, Mayenne only, as we dont want to far to travel, France, places like Emmaeus, where they sell lots of second hand stuff, from roof tilesand slates to furniture and garden stuff. or how to find out about house clearances and such like. i would be very grateful, thanks

I am looking for reclaimed roof tiles or slates, in the 53500 area of france?
hi i know this might be telling you to suck eggs, but look on ebay, french site, i was on there yesterday looking for a cheminee, and there weree loads on there, look under anciens in the bricolage catagory

Has anyone a suggestion to stop my cat climbing up my net curtains?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.004-08:00

I have this gorgously friendly cat called Nelson. Most of the time he's calm and spends his time curled up or sprawled out sleeping. But occassionaly he'll come screaming (not literally!) in from the garden, rush round the furniture, jumping from chair to chair and end up at the top of the net curtains hanging there, waiting for me to get him down!

Has anyone any suggestions?

Has anyone a suggestion to stop my cat climbing up my net curtains?
If you buy a water pistol or a water bottle from garden centres that you spray planks and fill it with water you can spray your cat when it climbs the curtains, thus it will associate that bad behavious such as climbing the curtains = a spray of water
Reply:trim and file his nails
Reply:Hi Val

your cats playing games with you and he knows once hes up them curtains you are going to give him some attention. Try and dis track him when he comes in or change the way he comes in as cats don't like changes Good luck an thumbs up for a good Question
Reply:yes, get rid of the net curtains which are sooo old fashioned.

Otherwise, get a small water pistol and when he climbs, say nothing, just squirt. That way he will think it's the curtains doing it and not you. so even if you aren't there, he won't climb them.
Reply:get rid of the cat or nets
Reply:First of all, you don't need to get him down, he can get down himself. As for stopping him climing the curtains try using a waterpistol. Each time he does it, sqirt him, but don't let him see you doing it. He will then associate being wet with climing the cutrains, he won't know why, but he won't want to do it again. The important thing is that he doesn't see you doing it so that he thinks its something to do with the cutrains.
Reply:put orange peel at the bottom of the nets as our cat did not like the smell and would not go any where near it.
Reply:It is much more easier than trying to train your cat. There is a spray that is healthy and very good for the animals. It is called NO SCRATCH! All it is, is a pheremone that is used to defelct a cat away. It is totally harmless and humans can not smell it, just spray it on your curtains. That way you will both be happy!! It really works I used it on my xmas tree for my cats!!!! Good Luck
Reply:Get a spray bottle and everytime he does that, spray him with cold water, most cats hate water and he should learn that way!!
Reply:take them down.
Reply:take the nets down i have now mine run up the curtains instead .:)
Reply:take it to your naboores curtons so it can tear thoose up not yours
Reply:My husband had a similar problem one time (this happened before we met, but he loves to tell the story). His kittens loved to climb the curtains, and he wanted to break them of that habit. He got a supply of narrow rubber bands, and left small stashes in several places in the living room. Whenever he saw a cat on the curtains, he'd grab the most convienent rubber band and fire it at the offender. The startled and stinging kitten would let go. Before long, they'd learned not to climb the curtains.
Reply:keep a water bottle by you with a spray on it. Spray him every time he gets up there. He will eventually stop. That's how I got my cats to quit climbing the christmas tree.
Reply:there is a spray you can buy at pet stores that doesn't stain, and cats don't like it. Try that on your curtains, or just keep telling him off when he does it - rolled up newspaper on the backside is a good, noisy but soft smack
Reply:Every time you see the cat do this spray him with a spray bottle. Cold water.
Reply:remove the netcurtains and get some shades
Reply:I hope you pay no attention to anyone who tells you to declaw him. For one, it sounds as though he goes outdoors, so he needs the claws. For two, is there any way you can try some two-sided sticky tape on your curtains? Cats hate the feel of it on their paws and if you could stick some where he lands on the curtains, it just might work. Good luck to you and Nelson!
Reply:get him a big tall scratch post to climb instead.

i caught my cat climbing the wall in the sitting room!
Reply:get blinds
Reply:you could try putting a double sided tape on your curtains, cats hate sticky stuff, or you could use a spray bottle and spray him everytime you catch him on the curtains. I would try the sticky tape first, the spray bottle thing didn't really work on my cat, but then again, she is weird and loves water. good luck
Reply:take off your curtains
Reply:Take the curtains down.
Reply:Get him one of those "Kitty Jungle Gyms"; consists of wooden poles coated with carpet; perfect for your kitty to scratch on and stretch his claws and to play on. =)
Reply:GET RID

of the curtains
Reply:water gun
Reply:declaw him
Reply:Why don't you amputate it's legs?

(Dogs are much better anyway)

Where can I buy a WHITE plastic patio table from in Blackpool Lancashire UK, tried everywhere? can anyone help

2011-11-19T18:44:00.003-08:00

I have tried all the big stores, poundstretchers, wilkinsons, B%26amp;Q, some sell green garden furniture but i want white, anyone in my area seen one? please let me know

Where can I buy a WHITE plastic patio table from in Blackpool Lancashire UK, tried everywhere? can anyone help
we got a white round one you can have it. with the chairs.
Reply:B %26amp; Q near at the end of M55
Reply:Try searching where fly tippers have dumped their crap.
Reply:Have you looked online?
Reply:Try ebay
Reply:try the mall or lakeland.co.uk
Reply:I got mine from Do it all / Focus. Try the site I've listed below. Best of luck.
Reply:There may be something of use here.

How should I write a poem for my grandmother?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.002-08:00

My grandmother's birthday is coming up soon, and people usually ask me to make the whole computer presentation for her party. It has to have a poem for my granny in it, but lately I've had writer's block and don't know what to write. Any suggestions on how it should go, or what I should put? She likes gardening, shopping, plants, furniture, stuff like that.

How should I write a poem for my grandmother?
Let love flow through your fingers.

Think about what your grandmother's life was like when she was your age.

Think of all that you know about her, whether she's spunky, fragile, wholesome, a pistol...or even all of these things at times.

The fact that you're not just slapping something together shows your love for her.

Since she likes gardening, consider the seeds she's planted in your heart. (Confidence, courage, faith?)

Change your environment, even if for a lunch break. Nature is great. Take pen, pencil, or crayon...and paper, napkin, or whatever...and doodle your way to an answer.

Best wishes.
Reply:Consider using humour - it gives a framework if you find it hard to find an emotional basis.

Use on of each of the 'likes' you mention to construct a witty verse.
Reply:With all of your heart
Reply:Yes... old people r very sensitive and it will make her happy to hear something that's dedicated to her(something special). She will feel loved. And old people love to feel loved, everyone does. Go for it! U should write from the heart. If u have a topic it will go harder. Just say whatever comes to your mind.

Enjoy! I really, really hope I helped!

xoxo

P.S: Say hi to granny for me.

shoes stock

What kind of tile should i buy for my floor ? Where are showroom or stores that you suggest to me to come?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.001-08:00

I'm looking for stores or showroom for home furniture near Garden grove

What kind of tile should i buy for my floor ? Where are showroom or stores that you suggest to me to come?
Surprisingly, Costco and Lowe's have a large tile selection in their flooring departments, and are usually able to make their tiles less expensive since it's a large national company and not a small flooring-only store.
Reply:How about an imaged ceramic tile mural for your floor-- any image

http://www.AliciaTappDesigns.com

I am looking for a 20% off coupon for Ashley Furniture that I saw recently in Better Homes & Gardens Magazine?

2011-11-19T18:44:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately, I dont have this coupon or know of where to get one. However, if the store is reputable, they will still honour it (or even perhaps have a few spares lying about)

Can wood treatment cause reaction when breathed in ,in enclosed areas?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.008-08:00

I have a room built for music(mixing on turntables)which is my hobby.i have had a reaction in my ears each time i occupy the room which is timber framed.Have discovered that just standing in the room without music on i have the same type of tingling feeling and was told that maybe i'm breathing in something toxic in the room that maybe giong to a week spot which can be the ears .Ive taken out all possible suspects like garden furniture,stained shelving etc but nothing majorly toxic(building is at end of garden).

The shed is a year old and on the inside is plasterboard fixed onto the timber framed ceilings and walls,on the extrnal is plywood covered in a waterproofed membrane and then sand and cement rendering.

When other people come into the shed they cant feel anything at all but then they're not exposed to it all the time as i am.Have had my ears checked privately and all was fine.

The music is played very moderately not at all banging loud

Can wood treatment cause reaction when breathed in ,in enclosed areas?
If your house or room has Wolmanized lumber or green treated lumber that is more than 8-10 years old and you breathed in any of the dust you could very well be poisoned.

The wolamized or treated lumber used to contain arsenic poison to kill insects and was outlawed several years back but some of that lumber is still sold from older lumber yards and reclaimed used lumber.

It is unlikely if you didn't breathe the sawdust yourself but it is very possible.I watched case on TV a few months ago that the doctors accused the husband of poisoning his wife until they both got sick and checked his house sure enough it was arsenic poisoning.

I'd get checked if I were you.I stopped using the lumber back in the late 80's before it was outlawed.

But I never showed any symptoms.
Reply:I've heared that it can be - check it out by googling or reading the tin as suggested.
Reply:Could the room be too airtight and causing a vacuum in your ears to build up? Try wearing a breathing mask to see if it still happens or other process of illumination approaches.
Reply:should say something on the tin

or try googling it for more info

Can you lay natural (raw) stone outside for an outdoor living area and how would you do it?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.007-08:00

I don't like manufactured stone and would like to use flat stones I have found for outside flooring in a garden- to put furniture on. What would I use to lay the stone/ how would I go about doing this?

Can you lay natural (raw) stone outside for an outdoor living area and how would you do it?
yes natural stone will work well and look grate. to start mark out the area you will lay the stone, level it out as best you can. if close to the house ,grade it so water will run away from the house.lay down a base of coarse sand.level it out and moisten it with a garden hose fine spray,then tamp it down to settle it in good. start laying your stones down make sure you level each stone to the one next to it.when all the stones are down spread sand over the whole area.with a broom sweep the sand into the spaces between the stones, when done spray the area once more to settle in the sand..and your done.let it dry and if needed add more sand to fill in any spaces
Reply:Q do you have to dig down and how much is in your budget and will you be doing it ?

if you have to dig down you will have to bring in sand and alot of it . you will lay the stones like you will a swimming pool . using the sand to level the surface as each stone will need a bit more or a bit less . then wen you have them all laid out you will need to fill in between the stones . but if you can avoid digging out and your yard is nice and flat you can lay some cheep paneling out then lay the stones then take some mortar and sweep it into the cracks and pound it in well then let the rain or a sprinkler do the rest . you will want to border the area with 2/4 so you will have a nice edge . but if you want it round you can use some of the paneling and some re barb to hold it in place you can buy it pre cut . but the paneling will work as both a grass stopper and give a solid place so that the stones will not sink . and just a thought but have you seen the lights that go in the ground with the thick plexy glass top that will make a good liting mixed in the stones

safety boots

How can i stop my 2 jack russel's digging up my garden when i go out? the oldest is only 2 years!?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.006-08:00

Tried shutting them indoors while i'm out but they destroy my furniture! they have plenty of toys, i don't know what else 2 try??!

How can i stop my 2 jack russel's digging up my garden when i go out? the oldest is only 2 years!?
JR's are very active dogs. They have loads of energy and need lots of exercise. Shutting them indoors will make them go wacko. You really ned to be out side with them and playing...often.
Reply:take his shovel off of him

or small piece of lead in his ear put it in with a colt 45
Reply:When you leave them inside, put them in a kennel. This should be standard practice for any dog that has shown a tendency to be destructive. When you let them out, put up a fence around the garden. They also make portable invisible fences. It is a stake that goes into the ground and makes an invisible fence in a circle around it. You set how big of a circle it is. Train them, or prevent the behavior. The answer really is pretty simple.
Reply:you need to chop off thier paws
Reply:sprinkle moth balls where you don't want them to be in the garden
Reply:flag the garden.
Reply:When my dog was digging up the garden i would put curry powder where they dug the most, or pepper, it makes them sneeze and they don't do it again, but saying that my english bull terrier who didn't dig the garden up sarted to because she liked the taste of curry, but it's worth a try and doesn't cost much
Reply:put wire fence around the garden
Reply:Jack Russells need a lot of excercise and training. If they don't get it, they find their own ways to entertainment them.
Reply:terriers are digging dogs. this is what they do! you cant teach them not too. didnt you research them beofre you got one? duh
Reply:The first and most obvious thing to try would be to fence the garden- if they cant get in, they cant very well dig it up!

If a solid fence wont work, or there isnt room to put one in, you could try a "sonic fence" product- they sell them online and in some pet stores. Basically they emit a high-pitched frequency that dogs can hear, but people cant (like a dog whistle)- the dogs dont like the sound, so they stay away from it.

You may also want to offer them some more constructive ways of using their energy. KONG brand toys are excellent- they're made of hard rubber with little slots and holes so you can put treats inside. The dogs can smell the treats in the toy, so they play with it relentlessly. Over time the toy will release bits of treat, so the dog is getting rewarded and will continue to play with it. The same toy can keep the dog occupied almost indefinately- just change what kind of treats are in it from time to time so they dont get bored with their rewards! :)
Reply:This is how.........

Click on the below link and I will show you the way........
Reply:Dogs with poor manners belong in crates when they are not being supervised.
Reply:Jack Russel's are usally very hyperactive. They need alot of excersize every day. About 2 hours every day. If you cant give them 2 hours build a fence about 6' by 8' that should be big enough for 2 jack russels
Reply:get them a sand pit and a bu cit and spade

How do you say this or call this ....?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.005-08:00

In American many family sell their on use things at the garden..furniture,lamps,antique...

how do they call it?

How do you say this or call this ....?
A garage sale.

Sometimes people will call it a yard sale also.
Reply:...bankrupt?...
Reply:Yard or garage sale.
Reply:yard sale
Reply:garage sale. now give me my ten points!!!

I came home yesterday to find my back yard swarming with tiny blueish beetle like insects.Wot are they ?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.004-08:00

They look like tiny tiny beetles ,blueish/ black colour with tiny atennas.First glance i thought they maybe ticks as i have a male cat that brings a stray into the yard everyday.Does anyone else know what they are ? They are all over the garden furniture,window,back door, fence, bbq ,washing .There are hundreds and i getting worried now darent hang any more washing out ! I t was quite windy yesterday could this have something to do with it ?

I came home yesterday to find my back yard swarming with tiny blueish beetle like insects.Wot are they ?
sounds like japenness beetles to me they sell traps for them you just got to put it far away from your house they will go to it and get trapped.Over the years I have seen bugs coming out way before there time like lightning bugs here it's only may and they aren't do till june but I got a feeling it's globle warming and every thing is off track.you can go to lowes and they have a chart on bugs look yours up and then they will have the right chems to use this is not good seeing all these thing comeing out to early this will effect the birds and there youg too.
Reply:put some in a small plastic box and send them to your local ministary of agricoulture and they will let you know what they are
Reply:Japanese Beetles

My dog keeps peeing on furniture - how do I stop him?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.003-08:00

My dog/pup is about 30 weeks old and we toilet trained him fine. He always goes to wee in the garden with the other dogs and when we go out for walks. However, over the past 2 weeks he has started cocking his leg up and peeing on my furniture i.e laundry basket, curtains, bed, cd rack - you name it, he pees on it. How do I stop him???

My dog keeps peeing on furniture - how do I stop him?
Interrupt him every time he pees somewhere inappropriate, take him outside immediately %26amp; praise him for peeing in the garden. Do NOT punish him to stop him but you will need to do something to stop him mid-flow (think in terms of gently startling him rather than scaring him.

You may find that castration could help with this problem as it sounds as if he is beginning to mark as he becomes sexually mature. I would recommend discussing it with your vet %26amp; a dog behaviourist to see what the best solution is.
Reply:The previous answer is spot on! But another bit of info - Disinfect/bleach the area where the dog has 'marked his territory' otherwise, if he can still detect his own scent, he will instinctively re-mark it.

You mention other dogs... If you have more than one dog they will need to establish their position in the pack. You, of course, are Top Dog (no offence) the dogs will establish their positions after you. A good way to enforce their status is to consistently feed, fuss let in %26amp; let out the dogs in their prospective orders. This will discourage them from competing for the top spot!

Hope this helps... Good luck Xx

safety shoes

Which saw should I buy?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.002-08:00

I need to buy a saw to cut small branches 2" to 4" for making rustic garden furniture. The saw would also be used for cutting treated wood of various sizes but mostly 4"x 2". I have arthritis in my hands and need some advise, would I be better to buy an all purpose electric saw or an electric chain saw. The prices of both saw would be at the lower end around £75. Has anyone used both types of saw and which would you advise me to buy.

Which saw should I buy?
I've been in the trades for a long time and have many tools, often very specific for a particular task. I have a feeling YOu need more than one tool for two very different tasks.

With all due respect to you, and certainly other answers I see, your issue with some debilitation might be aggravated by using either saw?

I have a few Recip. saws and a couple of gas/elect. operated chain saws. Each is designed for various purposes or choices of use obviously, but one might give you "finer" results than the other.

Your problem might be in just the weight of each and the angles you need to be using them at? My Recip. saws are every bit as heavy as my chain saws, but offer a finer, smoother cut, with multiple blade choices, even up to 8 inches, effectively.

The other issue you might encounter is in using either for the two different approaches you want to apply to the same sized piece of stock.

Either will work well on a cross cut...IE: Branch, but your suggestion in the Q is that you're going to be doing either type of cut "Freehand." I'll assume in the making of even rough cut furniture some RIP cuts might have to be made?

Without strictly knowing your techniques in achieving the "product" it's probably 50/50 for either saw. I've seen ART created with a chain saw, but that doesn't constitute it as FINE art. Likewise "RUSTIC" is a mind set as well as a look.

I suggest RENT both types for a weekend/week and practice the use, and effects of each, then judge them against your desires and designs.

If you work with either for any extended time period they will seem Heavier.

If you went all out and spent 150 pounds for two different saws you'd very likely find appropriate uses for both, and realize that they will pay for themselves in time.

Steven Wolf
Reply:I would also go with an electric reciprocating saw. I've used one before for cutting small branches as well as cutting a hole through a floor for a heating duct. I prefer it to a small chainsaw. You do have to hang onto this kind of saw fairly firmly, though, so take some painkillers for your arthritis before you start using it!
Reply:I would get a corded sawz all. They are relatively cheaper than battery powered and much lighter. A good one won't vibrate much and you won't have to sharpen the blades all the time. You just put in a new one. You can also change the size of the blades to fit the job you are doing. An electric chain saw is much heavier, more maintenance (sharpening blades) and much more dangerous. A resiprocating sawzall is the way to go.
Reply:uh, yea, um, my little brother had a recip saw go through his neck. it fell of a roof and landed blade first in his neck. if u get one, just remember safety first kk?
Reply:I would use a recipricating saw. Othwise known as a saws-all.

They ar not too expensive and they are fairly light so it shouldnt bother your arthritis much.
Reply:I would buy a Milwaukee reciprocating saw, you can buy different blades for it. The one for branches is called ":The Ugly" then they have blades for metal, wood, wood and metal. Depending on what type of blade you get they cost $3.00 up....Cheaper if you buy a pack of them.......
Reply:""Ryobi"" do one at around £70 (screwfix.com) no postage charge !! its a recipocating saw that will best suit your needs !! visit the web site and the details are there ?? as with many others ?? happy cutting
Reply:Consider two saws. A bow saw is great for cutting branches. I've tried to use Saws all for cutting branches and mostly found it to be a Pain in the arm. Each time the blade bites wrong and it will time and time again your body will catch the force and hands will ach if you use it a lot. Bow saws are fast with good blades four five pulls to take out a 2" branch. cost 10-20 $ for me. As for the 2x4 get a simple 7 /14 " chop saw. a 10" if you have the money.

The links below are only for picture value
Reply:ihaving used both types for many years i would go for the electric chainsaw for what you are doing- its easiest to use
Reply:Get a decent gasoline chainsaw. Don't screw around with an electric one.

You can get a decent poulan for around $100. has the power to cut. Keep the blade sharp.
Reply:I bought a reciprocating saw for about £25, with different sized blades upto 6 inches.

Its easy to use and is very powerful.

I would suggest a Recip Saw.
Reply:An electric reciprocating saw is probably your best best. You can even get cordless units from B%26amp;Q.
Reply:dont go for the chain saw ..get a chop saw ..the cuts are much more accurate ..faster ..and most important ..safer ..get a dewalt ..or a bosch .and you will never regret it ...get a jack saw for the branches
Reply:chain its easier than using a circular as the guard is a nuisance,you will also need a 9" cercular if cutting 4"

and they are cumbersome, retired builder.

you need to come and live in Luxor I am riddled with authrhitis in the uk and am in a wheelchair. here none as it never rains, i am 65 and started a new life and business,

any way take the chainsaw its handy for all kind s of wood cutting and most will give you a 12" cut,with no problem make sure you stick to the oiling and sharpening process and it will give you a long life never force it,
Reply:You should have them both. Branches are better with a chain. 4x2 with a circular saw. What is an all purpose saw?
Reply:Certainly do not try cutting round wood on a cicular saw, it will grab it, and could easily cause serious injury, why dont you go find somebody who is making items with rustic timber, and see what tools he is using
Reply:Steven has a good point about buying both types of saws and his point about renting the saws to try them is good as well. I think that a reciprocating saw would be more troublesome if you have arthritis because of the severe vibration. If you get a cheap gas chainsaw you will regret it because it will give you problems with starting and running. Echo, Stihl, and Husqvarna make small chainsaws that are made with quality. Makita and Milwaukee both make reciprocating saws that have anti vibration technology which would be to your benefit.
Reply:You need a Bow-Saw
Reply:For the branches, what about a camping saw? For the rest, a circular saw. Try some of the pawn or hock shops.
Reply:very itty bitty hand saw hack, it will give you a better work out.

How can I obtain a value on antique oriental furniture? I have a black lacquer item w/ genuine ivory inlay.?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.001-08:00

This was handed down by my grandmother, who was wealthy and purchased it in NYC in the 1940's or 50's. It has beautiful scenery(ivory) of women and children in a garden and on a shore fishing, with further detail handpainted in gold. The top opens and has more detail, then another surface that also opens to both left and right. Front cabinets, side cabinets, and corner cabinets to hold stemware. The handles are carved into the wood, and scallop shell shaped..

How can I obtain a value on antique oriental furniture? I have a black lacquer item w/ genuine ivory inlay.?
Hi. Here are websites that help to identify and date antique asian furniture. http://www.mqfurniture.com/identificatio...

http://www.consumer-manual.com/english/h...

Here are sites which sell buffet cabinets similar to what you describe, http://www.chinese-antique-furniture.net...

http://www.orientantique.com/class_np.as...

http://www.eastwindasianantiques.com/

You can also try sending a photograph to any of the major auction houses, Christies, Sothebys, Doyles, Bonhams...most have an Asian Arts division. They will evaluate it based on a possible consignment. You can submit your photo and info online.

hope I've helped a bit!

ASK maryantiques.com ... GET maryanswers!

http://www.maryantiques.com

we've got your ERA!
Reply:Try visiting an antique store, possibly chinese. They have alot of things that would match the inlay that your grandmother purchased. Chances are that it will cost some money though.

inline skates

I want to buy a pallet of wood from a supplier and not a timber merchants where do i go?

2011-11-19T18:43:00.000-08:00

The wood is for garden furniture so it needs to be of good grade

I want to buy a pallet of wood from a supplier and not a timber merchants where do i go?
Go direct to the saw mills, that's where the timber merchants get their stock from, before they add their cut to you.
Reply:Try the bigger merchants such as James Latham or Timbmet

http://www.timbmet.com/html/index.php

http://www.lathamtimber.co.uk/
Reply:Say what? A "pallet" of wood? Never seen such a thing. What's a "Timber Merchant"?

Do you want timber, or wood? And do you know the difference?

If wood, what dimmensions?

A "pallet" of wood would still be such a small quatity that no wholesale supplier would sell to you. A semi-load is about as small a quantity that a mill will sell directly.

Preparing wood for outdoor use?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.007-08:00

I am going to cut down a Rhododendron tree in the garden and would like to re-use the wood in the garden (e.g. garden chairs, table, bench, etc.)

What seasoning / treatment / etc do I need to carry out on the wood after cutting so that it will not rot or degrade once I have made into garden furniture?

.

Preparing wood for outdoor use?
cut it into the sections you want, melt some wax and dip the ends and store in a cool dry place for about a year, this prevents checking (cracks) then bark the wood and put together whatever your building and spray or paint on a good wood sealer clear or colored or you could stain it then seal it... good luck...
Reply:many outdoor furnitures made of wood are being injected with ati-insect, anti termite solutions

Are these pieces of furniture supposed to go together?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.006-08:00

I'm looking to update my room a little bit and was thinking about getting a new bed.

I started looking around and finally I found some stuff on overstock.com

Now the problem. I found a new bed and would love a headboard but I'm not sure if I get the platform bed that the headboard is made or even supposed to be with the bed.

Please send help.

Bed URL: http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Bro...

Head Board URL: http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Bro...

I suppose I'm not to worried if they DO go together physically as opposed to if they are supposed to or not be together visually.

Are these pieces of furniture supposed to go together?
The headboard looks like it comes to the floor in the picture they show. It does not look like it goes with the platform bed. The platform bed picture looks like a different headboard. I think the bookcase headboard is made to attach to a regular bed frame.
Reply:If you look on the page with the headboard and scoll down on the right hand side in the pic of the nightstand you can see the corner of what looks the same bed with the headboard. It's not much but will give you an idea about it, anyway.

Personally, I think it's alot of black but if you need the headboard, go for it.
Reply:Well, they were made for each other...literally. In reading the review at the bottom for the bed, the reviewer felt that the material used was cheaper than expected, therefore overpriced. Those who reviewed the headboard said it was confusing to put together and maybe shaky. So, $610 plus how much for freight? It's your money
Reply:it i were tight on money i would go buy to bookcases and paint them blk and use them as the headboard a lot cheaper or make a headboard yourself out of anything curtains hanging garden fence etc
Reply:Don't think they come with headboards. Platform beds are a differant type of bed than the usual conventional bed.

I just can't picture a headboard with a platform bed. They are more the sleek, clean looking bed.

Instead of a headboard, you could do something a little different. Look around and find something you like and put that above your bed. It would be your own personal touch.

A row of pictures or prints going straight across from one end to the other. Could be one a large item that suits your taste. Remember if you like it, use it. This is totally your desertion and no one else's.

Take your own tours of different furniture stores. They have display set-ups. You can get some ideas that way.

There are a lot of options to choose from.

Take your time and have fun with your make-over.

Someone stole a loaf of bread+ furniture from my kitchen at night??

2011-11-19T18:42:00.005-08:00

I went downstairs in the middle of the night as i had heard something making loads of noise (must have been a VERY clumsy burglar). As soon as i got into the kitchen i was hit around the head with a loaf of bread- which the burglar then ran off with!

I then found a note saying that someone had stolen back their loaf of bread that i had stolen from them...... I then went outside and my patio furniture was gone!?

What sort of loony would rid me of my bread and garden furniture??

Someone stole a loaf of bread+ furniture from my kitchen at night??
Is a sign! you must give things to the poor.
Reply:i didnt appreciate the kevin beating Report Abuse

Reply:Next time you hear loads of noise in your house phone the police.......don't go and investigate yourself. Probably the same insane person/s who took a moving van to my Aunt's house during the time her casket was at church and then the funeral procession afterwards and a tea arranged for visiting family and guests at the local hotel; when her son went back home her entire house had been emptied - nothing left. The neighbours, the few who were not at the funeral, when questioned by the police, thought that the family had arranged for the removal.
Reply:I fully understand tho it doesnt justify it this is a wacked out world and thehyll steal your eye teeth if they get the chance.

Maybe if possible get A security dog Last week I read in the paper in one days time 4 different gas thefts ranging from 90 dollars to ten dollars I will pray for you if thats any help at all
Reply:LMFAO !!! Sorry but how funny is that ! Smacked round the head with a loaf of bread ?!?!? Lol :)

One thing, how you steal someone else's loaf ? What is supposed to have been left by the milkman ? Lol :)
Reply:Someone planning an outdoor party with finger sandwiches as appetizers? Did they steal cream cheese and strawberries too? If so, that's who did it.
Reply:Maybe it was a prank.? Or it was a reall burglar trying to be funny at the same time...But at the saame time its kinda of werid..
Reply:I think you answered your own question. The person you stole the bread from.
Reply:Get yourself a Magnum (Vanilla)
Reply:someone who had just come off atkins diet and moved into unfurnished flat

jeez, so obvious
Reply:that's really odd.

must have not been planned out very well,

at all.

;D
Reply:hmmm

:)
Reply:someone with loads of problems
Reply:only you would know that
Reply:urhmmm ? x

choose roller blades

Garden centres in east Sussex?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.004-08:00

Garden/patio furniture

Garden centres in east Sussex?
Here you go: -

http://www.yell.com/ucs/UcsSearchAction....
Reply:hi ure best bet is to type in on google they came with loads.

Wicca people how have you got time to sacrifice chickens when you have all that furniture to make?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.003-08:00

Don't get me wrong, I love the comfortable garden furniture that you produce but it must take ages, how do you get the time to do that and run naked around a big oak tree covered in blood?

Wicca people how have you got time to sacrifice chickens when you have all that furniture to make?
Normally I defend Wicca here, but this is kind of funny.
Reply:Do you mean Wicker sir?
Reply:LMFAO!!!!
Reply:Sacrificing Chickens, Making Wicca/Wicker Furniture, Dancing Naked around the Oak Tree?????????!!!!

hahahahahaha LMAO!!!!!!!!!

Boy, you are a highly educated one, aren't you!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:someone has been watching the cruxible too much i think.....
Reply:Hahahahaaaaaaaaaaa that's pretty funny
Reply:your sense of humor is great!!!
Reply:It's not bloody easy, let me tell you! You should see my diary entry for yesterday:

Eat healthy breakfast

Work

Counsel friend on love life.

Search out sage and hemp for emotional healing spell for friend. (Store only has sage and onion stuffing. Probably no good - will make her chicken out of things. Make note to be more supportive next time).

Weave two garden sets in between chicken-slaughter. Sacrifice them only semi-officially on plastic cutting-board. Hope Hecate won't mind...although knowing her, she probably will.

Fit another chair in while offering roasts. Hecate obviously pissed - lightning bolt incinerates birds.

Order pizza - hope that will appease the goddess.

Chair gives me trouble - one leg being awkward. Force the job, and strips unwind as soon as I've tied them.

Perform karma cleansing, as my furniture-making appears to be going all wrong.

Chicken and Sweetcorn pizza arrives. Scrape all the chicken off for the goddess. Sweetcorn pizza goes cold and miserable quickly. No more lightning bolts, so obviously, at least someone's happy.

Late for the Oak Tree Committee Meeting! Quickly strip in front of fellow Wiccans. They look at me a little oddly.

Realise this is not a skyclad meeting. Feel slightly sheepish at having poured chickenblood over head before getting confirmation of this...

Go home. Beloved wife explains concisely that I'LL be cleaning the blood off the car seats this time.

Shower.

Consult Book of Shadows for a "more time in the day" spell. Need juniper berries. Wonder if vodka works just as well.

Sample vodka.

Wake up. New day. How the hell did that happen?
Reply:And lately they've been quite busy making that movie, too. You know...The Wicca Man. *groan*
Reply:Well, I can't tell you about the furniture part...that's oathbound material.

As far as us running naked around a big oak tree covered in blood...that is just ludicrous! You need to learn more about what Wicca really is!

We, in fact, run around big oak trees covered in Marmalade. (Some self-proclaimed Wiccans have taken to using diabetic jellies....blasphemers!!)
Reply:I've often wondered this myself. It is a pickle.
Reply:It's people like you that give Yahoo! Answers a bad name!!!!
Reply:you tell him *Dark Witch*
Reply:Yawn !
Reply:I would tell you how stupid you are, but you did make me smile.
Reply:It's not funny. It makes no sense Wiccans do not harm anything. Why would they sacrifices chickens? Now Pagans used to sacrifice animals that couldn't make it through the winter. Anyways.......
Reply:Dude stop watching TV and the Blair Witch Project. Second, that's VERY offensive... how would you like people calling your religion a chicken sacrificing cult?

Wiccans DO NO IN ANYWAY DO ANY BLOOD RITUALS, SACRIFICES, DEMON/DEVIL WORSHIP, or any of the crazy stupid things that people say who hate Wicca/Witchcraft and don't even know what it really means!!!

If you would do your damn research first before you start saying s**t and accusing people of sacrifice, you would know Wiccan are peacful, earth/nature loving people who want to live in harmony and not cutting animals heads off and praying to hell!!!

Stupid ignorant people make me sick, and I'm guessing your one of them... obviously!
Reply:Ya gotta sacrifice a few chickens to make good furniture. There is just no way around it.
Reply:(Rolling my eyes and shaking my head with a slight giggle as I repsond to this sarcastically) Yeah, never heard that one before.........

Paladin on the other hand had a pretty good pun.....

How can I keep my cat entertained in my flat - there is no garden accessible?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.002-08:00

He ignores scratching posts but scratches the furniture. He also ignores balls and other toys. He is steadily putting on weight despite only eating one pouch food/day. I need something to keep him active and stop him from getting bored!

How can I keep my cat entertained in my flat - there is no garden accessible?
You can get little rubber balls with small holes in that the cat can roll around. If you fill it with small treats, your cat will spend a couple of hours trying to get them out and getting exercise at the same time. Also, play with him for a long time in the morning so that he is tired when you leave him during the day.
Reply:This is a difficult one as he is ignoring the toys and things you already have so sounds like he is an outdoor cat by nature. You could try getting another cat to keep him company, other than that I don't know. If he is bored he will be destructive deliberately.
Reply:If you have a place out of his reach I'd grow him catnip, there is nothing more potent then fresh catnip! My cats also love honeysuckle toys. George, my over weight who doesn't play with toys cat goes nuts over his honeysuckle toys! If you have a window with a good view, maybe put a perch so he can see what's going on outside!
Reply:catnip mice or buy the little rubber balls etc with holes in %26amp; stuff the holes with cheese or some other food he likes....he'll play for hours
Reply:cat loves pieces of paper waded up in a ball, they make thier own game of it . mine loves it
Reply:my male cat is the same way... he loves to scratch on the furniture and hates balls and scratching posts.. but he loves playing in everyday throw away items (like an empty pepsi box, wal-mart sack, tin foil balls, shoe strings, anything just laying around the house....

if you've had him fixed that could be a reason he's putting on a lot of weight, male cats sometimes do that after they're fixed (i've had 3 or 4 who have gotten huge!)

if the weight becomes a major problem and health risk try talking to a vet about a different type of cat food there are some specially formulated to help control cats weight.

if none of this helps try getting him a companion (one around his age), but you might want to see if a neighbor or a friend has a cat that you can "try out" with him to see how well he'll get along with another cat in the house... more then likely he'll be a little aggressive towards another cat in his territory at first...

i hope i was able to help :)
Reply:Try buying the balls that you can put treats in. when the cat realises theres food in it, he might start playing with them. Also, catnip toys should do the trick if you haven't already tried them. If you are really really stuck, then maybe try going to your vet and speaking to them about it. They should be able to give you advice.
Reply:Buy him a PSP.
Reply:Get him a pet. He needs something to take care of. Another kitty would be good, but a girl kitten would be best. Just careful not to spoil the baby cat and make him jealous.

Also, tape something to the furniture he scratches, something he won't like to touch, like sandpaper ir drape a handtowel. That might help that.
Reply:Have you tried cat toys with cat-nip? Also you can plant cat-nip in flower pots. My cat likes it. He may be lazy. MY cat is.
Reply:For the longest time, our cats ignored the scratching posts. We ended up getting them declawed because it.

Now- many cats who ignore regular toys will have the most fun with a wad of paper, or maybe with something small and fuzzy. Also, at a novelty store, I found a ball that flashes and twitters when it rolls. When they haven't somehow lost it, they thoroughly enjoy it.
Reply:why have you got a cat if you do not have access to a garden? its obvious that your cat is bored and unhappy. cats like to roam by nature and I think your best option is to rehome it somewhere where it will be looked after properly.
Reply:get him a young sexy female cat. then he can chase her round the kitchen.
Reply:get him a big bowl of catnip mousies! let him bat them around everywhere!
Reply:Leave him a large, loaded bong and a pile of books and he'll be fine ;-)
Reply:My cats love the laser pointer light, I shine it on walls and they run all over the apt. I don't even have to get off the couch! I got mine at Petsmart.
Reply:catnip he will burn energy
Reply:buy another cat to keep him company

or buy a mouse for him to chase and eat!

or buy a budgie for same reasons as above!

why would you have a cat in a small flat in the first place???
Reply:Get another cat. Opposite sex, but same age. Cat's are very social and love feline company.
Reply:get another kitten. I know you think oh my another cat to get bored, but actually it will keep your older cat company. there will be the occaissional spat but that is normal for any multi-pet house. as well when kitten paly with toys your cat will want to see what is so interesting (kinda like toddlers, you know the your-toy-is-better-than-mine syndrome). It should calm you other cat down.

Also has he recently been neutered? this can change their hormones and their behaiviour drastically. That aside I still think a friend would help.
Reply:Buy him some catnip and put it on the scratching post
Reply:you can buy these ball things that have holes in - you put his biscuits in, then he has to bat the ball around to get the biscuits out...

OR

buy a hamster and a ball to put him in - our cat and hamster chase each other round the flat all the time - and the cat is MORE scared of the hamster - keeps him occupied!!!
Reply:This will sound weird but my cat really likes these boas on a stick. Barbie has the best one. I think it's called a Princess Featherwand. He goes nuts when he plays with it. In fact, he wimpered this morning when I took it away from him so we could play with it together.
Reply:i know this may sound weird but i know people who have house cats that have little harnesses and the take the cat out for a wee walk a few times a day of course not all cats like the harness but the ones i know do give it a shot
Reply:Cats have to have gardens. Its bloody cruel to keep them indoors.

Give it to someone who can give it a life
Reply:this all sounds silly, but it works.

Tie a showlace to a ceiling fan blade, or in a doorway and put a box fan near it. Turn the fan on low. The shoelace with gently move and attract kitties attention. They will play for HOURS!

be sure it is WELL SECURED, ad if it falls kitty may try to eat it.

try putting the TV on the "speed network" your cat may get intreged by the races, and try to bat at teh cars going round the track.

Download some bird sounds, and play them for your cat. Hide the Music player someplace so kitty can't find it. They will search the house to the bird.

my cat like to see who's on the phone, so i call home and let the machine pick up and talk to my kitty, he gets up and see's who's talking.

In furniture and small household items, what is the difference between rattan, bamboo, and wicker?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.001-08:00

I have quite a bit of this in my home and the dust has accumulated over the years. I have heard that bamboo can be cleaned outdoors with a garden hose, but before I do that, I want to assure myself that what I have is bamboo.

In furniture and small household items, what is the difference between rattan, bamboo, and wicker?
Look at these links for lots of information:

http://www.rcrattan.com/rattan2.html

http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-diff...

http://ezinearticles.com/?Rattan-and-Wic...

http://www.caneandco.co.uk/rattan-furnit...

What are some of the best hotels

Is now a good time to start buying garden stuff?

2011-11-19T18:42:00.000-08:00

Hi, i live in chicago and although it is cold, i am planning ahead for the spring/summer.

is now a good time to start buying grills, plants, pation furniture, and other various things used in a backyard.

i was thinknig that once the sales for spring stuff begins then prices would drop since more people are buying?

any suggestions?

Is now a good time to start buying garden stuff?
Yes, this is a very good time to buy garden accessories. It is the slow season for garden centers so you should be able to find some good deals.
Reply:I ran the garden center for Wal-Mart for 6 years so I can let you know somethings. Last years models need to go now and go fast. So you can pick those up for a great deal. The new merchandize is coming in and that won't be marked down. Just ask a salesperson where the sale things are. It is usually in the back of that department. You can even ask to speak to a manager to get an even better deal. Looks for rust or something wrong with it that you could easily fix. That would help even more. Good luck. I hope this helps.
Reply:i wouldnt personally start now but i know other people who have
Reply:I'm a member of a number of gardening forums, and several of our people are buying garden stuff now so they can avoid the rush and have their seeds and bulbs ready. I imagine the same principle can apply to grills and furniture.
Reply:Yes it is. But do a little shopping around to see who has the best deals. This is their down time so the stores are being competitive.

Where can I find the discontinued furniture made by Lea, Pattern Laurel Gardens? Any links?

2011-11-19T18:41:00.001-08:00

discounted..how long ago.. that's is a important question to answer. here is the thing as a rule of thumb, simple one word manufacture. I don't know of any direct links but if you call 411 maybe you will be able to get a phone number. Manufactures are more willing to help the consumer then the retailer. good luck

How to protect redwood?

2011-11-19T18:41:00.000-08:00

Beside boiled linseed oil, with what else can I tread redwood garden furniture to keep the beautiful color of the wood alive?

How to protect redwood?
Redwood is one of the most weather resistant woods in the world. For low maintenance (some people do nothing and like the aged look) but for others, the color is best retained with a good varnish like Marine Spar. The pain of any of these treatments, Thompson's included, is it must be repeated every year or two.
Reply:How about Thompsons Water Seal.It seals out the weather,plus you can re-apply it per instructions.

My boyfriend wants me to move in with him, but?

2010-05-20T19:45:00.002-07:00

which is great, but we both have our own houses, i have spent alot of time/money on getting my house and garden just right and i really love it, my house belongs to my mum where i live rent free, so if i moved out she would be able to rent out and make quite a bit of money a month, which of course would be great for her, but i have a whole house full of furniture which my b/f isnt willing to have in his house as he says he already has furniture,(i guess i could put it into storage until we buy a house together) his garden is small and i love having a veggie patch...ahhh what should i do??? its a bit of a catch 22 situ!

My boyfriend wants me to move in with him, but?
ask him to move in with you??
Reply:I think you should get some respect for yourself and NOT play house with this man . PERIOD.
Reply:Stay where you are. Unless he is willing to marry you, which would provide you with more security, do not give up that house just to move in with him. If he broke up with you a year from now you might not get that house back, or even if you did it could all be changed by the people who moved in.
Reply:I'm in a similar situation. i am moving into my partners house (have been practically living there for the last 6 months) we are planning on getting somewhere together in the summer. my large items of furniture and appliances are being stored until then. our plan is to asses which items to keep when we have a better idea of space and which items neither of us can be without.

is it a case of there not being room for your furniture or about him not wanting it in his house ? is this going to be that case with everything of yours? you need to sit down and seriously discuss all of this with him

good luck hun x
Reply:sure, it would be good for your mum to have that extra income, but she wouldn't really know what sort of tenants she'd get until they moved in. the house could end up like a rubbish tip, or it could be perfectly cared for - you just never know! as you're having doubts, i'd say stay put. it's a huge thing to give up your home %26amp; move in with someone else. %26amp; you don't even know if you COULD live together. i'm sorry if i sound like a pessimist, but you'd be giving up so much. you've done a lot to your home, you've got it how you want it, you've got your familiar things around you. do you really want to give all that up? i'd be more cautious because of your boyfriend's attitude as well. he doesn't want you to bring any of your furniture etc; so what's he giving up? i may be an old cynic, but it sounds to me he's going to keep his life etc as it is, with the added bonus of a live-in housekeeper! please think very carefully about it %26amp; think of yourself first. it isn't being selfish; it's more like self-preservation. good luck, diane.
Reply:he seems mean for not letting you move in your stuff. why would you wanna move in with someone like that?
Reply:I think you should stay in your houses until you get married and then after you get married get a house for the both of you and you can have your own stuff if you have Jobs and went to college???

I'm not judging
Reply:Stay where you are, until you find a house that you can buy together.
Reply:you need to talk openly and honestly and write down the pros and cons of each others house and decide which has would serve you better if you think you and your boyfriend will get married which house would be suitable for kids ect, a little comprimise on both parts can easily be done if you are willing to listen to each others views and im sure you can use both bits of furniture ect just listen and comprimise, good luck
Reply:if you have doubts, which u clearly do, then stay were u are until u are 100% sure.

i wud advise living together before buying a house together tho. i no a few ppl who have bought houses 2gether and then realised they cant live 2gether.
Reply:Either ask him to come to yours ( it sounds an easy sell!) of wait , he may change his ideas.
Reply:It seems to me he wants it all on his terms, and doesn't care what you want. Do you really want to move in with someone who is so selfish? Once you give it up you can never get it back the same.
Reply:Hello, You feel you will not be happy when or if you move in with b/f, Why don't you buy your mothers house between the two of you that way you get what you need and the b/f gets what he needs your mum gets the cash she needs. Bingo all live happily ever after. Good luck.xx
Reply:Ask your boyfriend to put his house up for sale, and put your money into helping him buy a place that fits both of you. In that way neither fo you lives in the others house, but one you both want. This is called compromise.
Reply:So the question is, how bad do you (want) to move in with him? There's your answer.

Giving Cats Pills.......................?

2010-05-20T19:45:00.001-07:00

INSTRUCTIONS FOR GIVING YOUR CAT A PILL

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with lef hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10.

4. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

5. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, holding front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold cat's head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

6. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

7. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with its head just visible from below spouse's armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force cat's mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

8. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

9. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

10. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

11. Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

12. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Force cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 pint of water down throat to wash pill down.

13. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room; sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Stop by furniture shop on way home to order new table.

14. Arrange for vet to make a housecall.

Giving Cats Pills.......................?
Ha! My vet showed me how to give my cat pills. It took him 2 seconds but I did it your way...
Reply:cool
Reply:ha ha ha funny
Reply:Brilliant. lol ☺
Reply:So true. Hahahahaha
Reply:LOL :-)
Reply:nice one

Wondering if I should get married or not, My fiance of 2 years will not do anything in house.?

2010-05-20T19:45:00.000-07:00

He moved in with me last October, and when you ask him to do something, well it is always maybe, I have just finished painting %26amp; decorating our bedroom %26amp; livingroom ok he did do the bedroom ceiling but he is 6ft 5in compared to my 5ft 1in He is also 38 and I am 49 years of age, I was left to move all the furniture, well I had to do it as he was down the pub watching football, when he did come in he said (you should have left that till I was here) even though he was in when I started doing it. Yesterday he did help me clean out the garden shed, but it was all swearing kicking things about I just knew he did not want too do it, he just wants to sit about the house jumping channels when not in the pub. Please advise can you change someone or not

Wondering if I should get married or not, My fiance of 2 years will not do anything in house.?
Hi,in your heart you already know the answer to this,perhaps bacause of your age,you might be thinking " who else will i meet?". Well believe me you will,and some one you deserve! Get rid of the lazy ****. he will always be this way!...Goodluck and be happy!
Reply:If you are asking yourself if you should marry this man, then you already have doubts. The best advice I can give you is, when in doubt.... don't!

And your second question: can you change someone?

If you want to change him, why are you with him?

The only person you have the right to change and the opportunity to change is YOU.

So, you have two choices, and they basically boil down to go or stay.

Go away from him or stay with him.

Go away from your way of thinking and behaviour; or stay with that mind set.

Why are you staying with him? They stopped giving martyrs sainthoods a lot time ago.

You either love him and his quirky ways are endearing; or his quirky ways are going to irritate you more over time.

Perhaps you could examine your needs and then make a decision based on the rest of your life, because no matter if you stay together or part, it is going to affect the rest of your life.
Reply:u have to realise u cant change him.......i thot the same as well but my boyfriend 4 4yrs never changed......We just broke up cos i realised i had no chance in hell of changin him....and plus i ran out of patience. Although a friend of mine who has been married for 9yrs says her husband is way better (character-wise) than he was when they 1st got 2gether......it culd be that hes gettin older or hes actually changed

On he's defence tho.....some guys are laid back (no offence) and always need a push to actually get things done......I'm sure u've got some bad habits he's puttin up wiv

I think u need 2 feel it in ur heart, make sure he's the one........and have a lot of PATIENCE......

No one can make up ur mind 4 u cos at the end of the day its ur life........

hope this helps, good luck
Reply:The thing is if he's not doing these things now when you get married he's still not going to do them and he could use the excuse of before we got married I never used to help around the house so why should I start now. If it's really getting to you then you have to tell him and make him do things around the house. For example stop doing his washing for a week, if he leaves things like dishes around and you have to pick them up then stop doing it and hopefully after a while he will either say something to you about it. OR he will start picking up after himself and start doing things.

The thing is if you don't talk to him about it now, its not going to improve once you are married
Reply:In a word - No.

Get rid of him, sounds like a complete waster.
Reply:you should be marrying someone because you are in love with who they are. the fact you are wondering should you marry him should be ringing enough alarm bells. But the fact you want to marry him then hope to change him???? thats unrealistic, if you marry him, he will naturally think you love him as he is, and quite rightly resent you wanting to change him. Do you think marrying a man is like getting a puppy? take him home and train him?? you sound a strong capable person, why are you hoping to make a man out of this guy? he prefers to be down the pub with the boys, let him go out to play and find a grown up man to love and be a companion through life
Reply:No,you can't change him and he won't change unless he wants to...You are having doubts about marrying him so DON'T !!!
Reply:If ur 49 u shoud know u wont be able to change him. if u hav doubts dont marry him.
Reply:lol sounds like married life already and u aint even married.if you having doubts then dont get married you have to 100% feel happy and be certain about it
Reply:I think you already know the answer to this question,You have nothing good to say about him,so why are you with him?
Reply:It doesn't sound like he's going to change his ways, he lacks the respect and support that you deserve.

Get rid of him!
Reply:i would put the wedding on hold until you are 100% certain he has changed not many men do if you do everything he will never change give him some responsibility i have to with my partner he gets very lazy until my foot goes up his bum but its up to you if you like the way he is then carry on if not tell him to shape up or get out .....................
Reply:Unfortunately, you can't change a person or make them do what you'd like them to do if it's not in them to do it. It's sad that he won't help out, but after 2 years of being with him, did you know this? I would sit him down and have a serious talk with him if I were you. In the long run, you're going to get tired of pulling all of the weight and this might cause problems in the relationship. It would be best to nip it in the bud!

Good Luck!
Reply:Wow, he sounds like a real catch,better snap him up right away before some other unlucky lady gets landed with him...
Reply:Hi, unless you loose your rang and put your foot down he aint going to change. Most men are like this. I dont think its an excuse not to marry him though unless you are seriously not happy. If hes a manly man not a man who loves house work then he will never change they are all the same. But he lives with you now and I suggest you make a few rules. You are engaged there is no need to plann a wedding yet. Just see how it goes. Like some people say when moving with each other you get to see what the other half is really like and unless there willing to accept a few changes in your homw then maybe it wont work.

As all women say, if you want anything doing do it yourself and if they ask you to do something tell them to do it themselves. If you do it yourself if saves your fiance throughing a strop and losing his temper then he will feel gulilty for no helping you when you have done it on your own.
Reply:well men are men they will never do what you want them to do. and no you can't change someone. if it's getting crazy lazyness. i would talk to him and tell him that he has to pull his own weight if he wants to be there, you are not his maid cook decorator. just remember your weight is always gonna be more than his( figuratively i mean). couse men are babys
Reply:Sorry my answer is short and sweet - NO. The idea you are having doubts means in your heart you know yourself it will not work out. Only solution could be a break away from each other for him to sort himself out and if he then agrees you are correct and he genuinely changes his ways could work out. However he should be changed for a long time before the marriage takes place.
Reply:I would say a 'definate NO !!'
Reply:you have to be brave and tell him you are not prepared to spend the rest of your days clearing up after him, he is an adult not a child,if he see's household and garden chores as womens work kick him to the kerb,you should not let him use you as free bed and board, and i am sure you would find yourself another partner in no time.
Reply:Janet, STOP doing things yourself and see how long it is before he asks things like "Whats for dinner?"

When he asks and believe me he will, just say to him "It's the chefs night off. So we're having whatever YOU are cooking"

If he won't cook and gets a takeaway, fine, leave the washing up and get him to do it. If he won't you know where you stand.

When my partner is at work, I do the washing, cleaning, cooking etc and so must HE!
Reply:He'll always be like that, unless you sit him down and discuss it with him. Tell him how you feel when he behaves like that. If he loves you, he'll change. If he doesnt change you have to decide if you want to stay with him or not. He might try turning it into an argument to avoid the issue, so keep your cool. Good luck ;-)
Reply:I've got one of those, too!! I blame his mother! lol

He's 13 years younger than me and we've been together for 10 years (known each other for 16) and I haven't got him trained yet!
Reply:you've been engaged to him for 2 years already and haven't married? i think you have your answer. there is also a 11 yr difference in age. even at 38 he doesn't sound mature enough to be married.
Reply:No you can't and shouldn't even try - don't get married to this guy until he can prove that he loves you and is committed to you. If you are questioning your relationship I think you already have your answer.
Reply:A marriage certificate wont change his pattern of behaviour.
Reply:You've been engaged for two years, why so long? Who keeps putting off the wedding?

He shows no interest in home life or partnership. Does he want to get married? He seems quite happy living in the comfort of your home and behaving like a single man.

He's not ready to get married. Ditch him.

You can't change anyone, by the way. You shouldn't even try.
Reply:If marrying him hangs on him helping you I would say no - do not marry him and do not live with him.

You definitely won't change him.

It is a question of whether you are prepared to put up with a lazy inconsiderate male or are you worth something better!

Good luck whatever you decide.
Reply:If you want to buy a house and that you find a house you don't like because of some detail, would you risk spending the rest of your life in it ?
Reply:I hope you don't marry him. You're going to live with somebody like that for the rest of your life? Give yourself another life.
Reply:in the words of a no doubt song

"i find myself trying to change you

if you were meant to be my lover i wouldn't have to"
Reply:seriously, dont take that from him. if he loves you he will help you with such physical things, he shouldnt sit back and watch you struggle like that.

tell him that you want him to help you more, if he DOES love you and DOES want to marry you he will help. there is no point wasting your life on someone who does not care about your struggles, there are plenty of lovely blokes out there who would probably love to meet you. i hope things work out for the best! good luck! x x x

Nintendo Wii

Wal*Mart jokes are still funny?

2010-05-20T19:44:00.003-07:00

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them

and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

4. Don't bother doing your own shopping. Simply find someone with a full trolley containing roughly the items you need, and when they are not looking take it and go pay for it at the checkout. (this is not stealing, they did not own the items yet, they were simply 'moving them around')

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the

spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit, then arrange them into erotic poses. (be creative with the gift-wrap tubes used in point 6).

9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly,

especially in thin aisles.

11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off

and turn the volume up to full blast.

12. Re-enact a fatal incident involving the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen

you in so long." etc. See if they play along. Insist on calling them 'Bob', and if they protest, get angry about it (violent if necissary).

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself

loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"

15. When you leave the store, try your car keys in the door of every car in the car park until you get to your own. Then drive off as if this is perfectly normal. (Note- if you don't actually own a car and walked to the store, attempt the above by substituting car keys with your house keys).

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are

taking it for a test drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet

behind them. Do this until they leave the store.

18. Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. For added fun: See how many cashiers you can glue to each-other before any of them notice.

19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customers items. If the cashier protests, kill them.

20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and

when they say you didn't buy it there say "The customer is always right dammit!!" Make a scene.

21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to The parking lot

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other

aisles.

24. Ask a really fat customer "Son im gonna need that ham back"

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,

"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."

26. Climb things.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"

upside down. Once you have mastered this, progress to "boobs".

30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between

them yelling "Red Rover."

31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any

in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples). Do a vague hand-mime of what a 'Shnerple' looks like to assist them.

32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale

battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.

33. Take bets on the battle from above.

34. Test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics on all the live animals in Pet-Care.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Put your T-Shirt on top of your head and say "I AM THE GREAT CORNHOLIO! I AM A GRINGO!"

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags against their will.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to

your Twinkies."

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: Marco Polo.

43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet

section, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's using an alternative alphabet of your choosing.

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with

various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at

something, quickly place random combinations of items in their cart, such as 'A Large Cucumber and a Tub of Vasceline'.

47. Relax in the patio furniture drinking beer until you get kicked out.

49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to

the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out

much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. Start playing Football, see how many people you can get to join in.

52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

53. Play a game of indoor freeze tag.

54. Drive around the entrances screaming out the window "the British are coming! the British are coming!!"

55. Have a team race with your friends- one person sits in the cart, the other pushes.

56. Run into a pyramid of cans, heroically saing "I'm gonna save us from that bomb!"

57. Grab heavy but not too heavy objects, and see who can throw them the most aisles over.

58. Randomly direct people to the deodorant section

59. If people arent looking at their cart, steal it.

60. See how much stuff you can break before you get caught.

Wal*Mart jokes are still funny?
halarious.. i have done a few of these...
Reply:2 free pts wooow!
Reply:i got that in an email 10 years ago, lol, i guess..
Reply:wut the f*ck?
Reply:I was in the eye doctor's office in our local wal-mart the other day, and there was this dude in there getting his glasses fitted....we live in Kentucky and he had this thick (sounded like New Jersey) accent....he was talking to the technician and she ask him if he was allergic to anything, he said:

"yeah, i'm allergic to beer"

"BEER! no?" she replys

"yeah....it makes me break out in black-eyes and handcuffs!"
Reply:no
Reply:ALIENSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
Reply:You seem to have an obsession with Wal Mart.
Reply:Jeez, I forgot....what was the question?

Do I sack my maid?

2010-05-20T19:44:00.002-07:00

I do keep my place clean, but my Husband throws eggs and mess around. He brought in a maid and now constantly says how wonderful she is and keeps making digs at me. when she came she changed all my furniture around, she keeps my cuboards in a mess, and she keeps talking to my husband in arabic, which I don't yet speak fluently, while we are eating our dinner. If me and my husband are talking, she interupps and he goes off with her to the garden talking and just leaves me there. She is also very giggly around him.

My husband arabic and I english, she complained to him that one day I wanted to eat english food, which is rare as we live in Egypt.

He told me to sack her today so this headache will finish.

I may need her soon as we are trying for a baby, and I have a condition that makes me bedridden for this time. So I need others opinions please.

What do I do, my husband has made me feel insulted, and I feel in competition with another woman, in my own home. does she stay or go?

Do I sack my maid?
Sack her In Egypt people have there position in life and when they start to get friendly they will start taking liberties you come home find them watching TV smoking etc instead of working She knows her position in your home and shes tyring to give herself position that she hasn't been given.
Reply:Why are you trying for a baby with such a man?? Sack this stupid girl and get yourself together before doing anything!! Also get your husband to back you up. This is a ridiculous situation to be in!! Stand up for yourself!!
Reply:I think something has been going on with her and your husband.Sound suspicious to me.Get rid of your husband
Reply:U want to have the cake and eat it too.
Reply:I think she is getting too personal with your family. Get rid of her. You may have to find another or try to do the housework just yourselves. Good luck.
Reply:AHA! the maid wants your husband mostly.

but since he wants you to sack your maid. dont!

i'd rather fire her. and then get another maid that is NOT like the first maid. but you should make her jealous first by ignoring her and not letting your husband know that you are ignoring her for 1 or 2 days. and dont let her get away so easily. dont let her do sneaky things that you dont disagree behing your back like se* with ur husband.
Reply:She has to go! Its your home and you must feel confortable in it. Your husband doesnt sound very supportive.

If he hired her, he should fire her. He should respect you enough to fire her. Be professional and polite.
Reply:Get rid of her and make sure you give her a cr*p reference because she is being totally unprofessional! Teach your husband not to throw things about
Reply:sack the maid !! can't believe she's taking over ur house and trying to get her nasty hands on ur husband, maids clean they dont change ur furniture round like it there home and there's something really strange about he's going off to talk to her in the garden...i would sit down with ur husband n tell him its very disrespectful talking to her in arabic in front of u and letting this ***** tell u what to eat and interupps your conversations with your husband! i think kick her out u can always get sumone who will do as u say! and have a good telling off to ur husband thats so disrespectful how hes treating u!!
Reply:As soon as posssible look a repalcement and ask her to leave and dont have your house help at the table when having your meals. Set the boundaries or risk having the second maid come too much into contact with your husband and the same problem coming up. cos if it happens again your husband will accuse you of being a nag and oversuspisious.

All the best. Let her go NOW!!
Reply:Get rid of her.
Reply:Maid is to close to your husband and does not respect that it is your house obviously. Get rid of the maid find a new old unattractive one that can help you with your house and possible new child interview and make it clear when you do your house your way whoever excepts it give them a try. You are not stuck with this lady she is one in a million.
Reply:I think you're husband is sleeping with your maid. Seriously, they go off talking in the garden? She is giggly around him? Either she wants to sleep with him, or they already have. And your husband may be telling you to fire her because he feels guilty or thinks you may catch on. I say fire her.
Reply:Suggest, employ a maid of YOUR choice; i.e., a maid who is loyal %26amp; sincere to YOU + dedicated to YOUR requirements.
Reply:I would say she goes..but i would also leave him. It is wrong to speak Arabic in front of you. I have felt alot of different people in this world that know how to speak english can do so..It is very hard for others that don't speak it. Sorry I don't know why people marry into other culture as they make it very hard for the white race and can get away with it. But thats the price you pay when you want to marry another culture. there is nothing wrong with it ..if they can treat you with respect and this never happens. I'm not races but I sure don't like what i have seen and heard.
Reply:sack her and hire an old weighty maid that your husband will find unappealing

you are facing disaster if you keep her

statistically 90% of all men who cheat, cheated most during their partner's pregnancy

so to have the giggly bubbly little girl around while you're getting weaker and less able to compete for attentions and affections.... you're implying consent to extramarital activities by allowing her continued presence

by finding a maid / nanny yourself, you can ensure thet the candidate will have the proper qualifications both in experience and appearance. therefore you can calm your worries, and be sure that your child, marriage, home, and family are in well qualified and caring hands.

either that, or you could tell your husband that he can keep her on if he agrees to hire an english buttler of your choosing...

by the by.... you can interview from your bedside if necessary... or for a few hours a day, maybe you can muster the strength to make it to the parlor for interviewing
Reply:This person is ruining your life. Start looking for a new maid and short and sweetly KICK HER OUT!!!
Reply:D*mn...kick her *** out of your house, girl!!! That's F-I-N-A-L.
Reply:Definitely get rid of her. You should never put yourself through this sort of thing. If you're in competition with your husband, plus she's not a good maid in the first place, it all adds up.

You can hire a new maid when the baby comes - don't worry!
Reply:Throw out the husband %26amp; keep the maid.
Reply:kick her to the kirb

if she really was only the made she would not act like this what are they really up to
Reply:stop being a lazy ***** and sack her and do your own cleaning
Reply:Run her off and do it now!
Reply:Get rid of this maid immediately before some thing serious happens. if you need some maid - get one a bit aged around 40-45 who is already married and have children. This is my sincere advice to you. To save your 'home' is yours major responsibility.......... good luck
Reply:BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING YOU MAY REGRET LATER, SPEAK TO YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT YOUR CONCERNS AND BE VERY HONEST ABOUT THE COMPETITION THING. You might find he doesnt see your view on things but be patient and explain it to him in a way that he will understand , oh and good luck with the babies!
Reply:Being that you've chosen to live in a culture that treats women worse than the ho's in a rap video, you should accept your choice. I'm surprised he hasn't made the maid his 2nd wife yet.

And before you start talking divorce, you better read up on the laws in Egypt, ignorance of the law there could cost you your head.
Reply:Your husband should honor you. Keep this maid until you get a new one. When get a new one, pay the old one and say good bye.
Reply:First off tell her to leave when you too are eating it is very disrespeactful for who to interupt you when talking your her employer set some guidelines and rules. Stop letting her walk all over you if you want english food once in awhile if she knows how she is the maid she is paid to do what you tell her.
Reply:Sack her, get someone else, its easier
Reply:the maid goes if u do need one u can always get another one... one that speeks english and not arabic best of luck
Reply:Your husband throws eggs around ???.....Yes get rid of the maid and make your husband clean his eggs up !

Do you think these are funny?

2010-05-20T19:44:00.001-07:00

Sixty-Eight Fun Things to do in Walmart

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3.Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Football; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Run up to an employee (preferrebly a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him " I need some tampons!!"

6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

7. Try on bras over top of your clothes.

8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms

9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "sex and candy"

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this ****, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.

17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins. 18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M%26amp;M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

33. Take bets on the battle described above.

34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!!)

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission:Impossible."

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: "Marco Polo."

43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle,etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.

45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

46. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them

47. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

49. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

51. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good bessie."

52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

53. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something,quickly make off with it without saying a word.

54. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

55. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

56. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

57. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)."

58. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

59. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

60.When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

61.Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

62.Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

63.Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

64. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

65. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

66. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."

67. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

68. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it!

Do you think these are funny?
Very good! I have it in for Wal Mart anyway. This should make my next visit much more interesting. Thanks!
Reply:A lot of time on ones hands? You should suggest those to girls behaving badly, because I have a very strong feeling they would actually do that stuff. Report Abuse

Reply:Yea i think this is pretty funny Report Abuse

Reply:oh my gosh that is hilarious Report Abuse

Reply:I've seen that before...I've tried doing them, but some employees caught me.
Reply:You completely cracked me up!!! Haven't laughed like that in ages - I have tears in my eyes!!! I can just imagine someone doing those things - I'm still laughing as I type this! But............ remind me NEVER to go shopping with you!!
Reply:no
Reply:those are funny like high prices are hilarious
Reply:I loved these. I have actually done many of them, or a variation of them. I loved the on about sacrifices.

Concerning the condom one....that works best with an old woman-putting three or four boxes in her cart.
Reply:Oh my gosh! I love it! I totally cracked up over all the stuff you put up. I probably look like a nut laughing hysterically all by myslef in the house. LMFAO but who cares?! Good job if you made all these things up by yourself...it would be fun to go shopping with you...although i would hide and watch from a distance. LOL.
Reply:I like no.31.. lol
Reply:Hahaha, they're really good! I don't have a Wal Mart, but I have an Asda! *Sly look*...
Reply:I must commend you for writing down 68 things to do.
Reply:these are HILARIOUS!!! i have to do some of them!
Reply:my family's looking at me like im crazy because i was laughing so hard^_^
Reply:That is very halarious!!! lol, lmao, rogl, roglmao!!! im gunna try a few of these!!!
Reply:My friends did all of this at one store because they thought it would be funny. And they got banned from Target, Cosco, Walmart, and most of the malls in southern california.
Reply:yeah, these are pretty funny. it would be awesome to see someone do this.
Reply:some of them were more funny then others,

but there was a problems with 67, i haven't seen a typewriter in a long time, maybe you should put the "/ computers" after the word typewriter.

maybe you add

go to the camera department with a friend and look at the cameras which are connected with the security cord and have your friend act like they are a model and you practice taking pictures.

go to the hardware department and get a step ladder and start walking through the store and see if anyone asks why you have the step ladder...... i need to reach something from the top shelf.

if you speak more than two language, talk to the employee with a foreign language, when they got some one who speaks that language, talk in a different language.
Reply:I think I've shopped behind you before.
Reply:yo jokes are kinda funni

lol

Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products?

2010-05-20T19:44:00.000-07:00

Liquid Plummer

Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

Windex

Do not spray in eyes.

Toilet Plunger

Caution: Do not use near power lines.

Dremel Electric Rotary Tool

This product not intended for use as a dental drill.

Arm %26amp; Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter

Safe to use around pets.

Bowl Fresh

Safe to use around pets and children, although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from toilet.

Endust Duster

This product is not defined as flammable by the Consumer Products Safety Commision Regulations. However, this product can be ignited under certain circumstances.

Baby Oil

Keep out of reach of children

Little Ones Baby Lotion

Keep away from children

Hair Coloring

Do not use as an ice cream topping.

Wet-Nap

Directions: Tear open packet and use.

Dial Soap

Directions: Use like regular soap.

Stridex Foaming Face Wash

May contain foam.

Hairdryer:

Do not use while taking a shower.

Old Spice Red Zone Deoderant

Use only on underarms.

Zantac 75

Do not take if allergic to zantac.

Sleeping Pills

Warning: May cause Drowsiness

Christmas Lights

Warning: For indoor or outdoor use only.

Bic Lighter

Ignite lighter away from face.

Komatsu Floodlight

This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark

Fire Extinguisher:

Caution: Non-Flamable

Earplugs

These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe

Mattress

Warning: Do not attempt to swallow

Matches

Caution: Contents may catch fire.

Pepper Spray

Caution: Never aim spray at your own eyes.

Auto-Shade Widnshield Visor

Warning: Do not drive with sunshade in place. Remove from windshield before starting ignition.

Fix-a-Flat

WARNING: Do not weld can to rim.

Rain Gauge

Suitable for outdoor use.

RCA Television Remote Control

Not Dishwasher Safe

Pine Mountain Fire Logs

Caution: Risk of fire

Triops Fish Food

Warning: Not for human consumption

Home Depot Treated Lumber

Do not consume

Hair Dryer

Warning: Do not use while sleeping.

Road Sign

Caution water on road during rain.

Camera

This camera will only work when film is inside.

Road Sign

Cemetery Road. Dead End

Church Parking Lot Sign

Thou shalt not park

Children's Superman Costume

Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

Silk Soy Milk

Shake well and buy often

Air Conditioner

Caution: Avoid dropping air conditioners out of windows.

Rowenta Iron

Warning: Never iron clothes on the body.

Slush Puppy Cup

This ice may be cold

American Airlines Peanuts

Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

Nabisco Easy Cheese

For best results, remove cap.

Swanson TV Dinners

This product must be cooked before eating.

Hershey's Almond Bar

Warning: May contain traces of nuts

Heinz Ketchup

Instructions: Put on food

500-piece puzzle:

Some assembly required.

Beach Ball

CAUTION: It is not a life saving device.

Chainsaw

Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.

Sears hairdryer:

Do not use while sleeping.

Bag of Fritos:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Bar of Dial soap:

Directions: Use like regular soap.

Swann frozen dinners:

Serving suggestion: Defrost.

Hotel provided shower cap in a box:

Fits one head.

Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)

Do not turn upside down.

Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding:

Product will be hot after heating.

Packaging for a Rowenta iron:

Do not iron clothes on body.

Boot's Children's cough medicine:

Do not drive car or operate machinery.

Nytol sleep aid:

Warning: may cause drowsiness.

String of Chinese-made Christmas lights:

For indoor or outdoor use only.

Japanese food processor:

Not to be used for the other use.

Sainsbury's peanuts:

Warning: contains nuts.

American Airlines packet of nuts:

Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

Korean kitchen knife:

Warning keep out of children

Helmet mounted mirror used by us cyclists:

Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you

New Zealand insect spray:

This product not tested on animals.

Blanket from taiwan:

not to be used as protection from a tornado

Cardboard windshield sun shade:

Warning: Do Not Drive With Sun Shield in Place.

Infant's bathtub:

Do not throw baby out with bath water.

Package of Fisherman's Friend throat lozenges:

Not meant as substitute for human companionship.

Disposable razor:

Do not use this product during an earthquake.

Bottle of shampoo for dogs

Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

Curling Iron

Warning: This product can burn eyes.

Hair Dryer

Do not use in shower.

Hair Dryer

Do not use while sleeping.

Hand-held Massaging Device

Do not use while sleeping or unconscious.

Case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket.

Do not place this product into any electronic equipment.

A toilet at a public sports facility

Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking.

Pair of shin guards made for bicyclists

Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

Container of Underarm Deodorant.

Caution: Do not spray in eyes.

Aim-n-Flame fireplace lighter.

Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks.

Toner cartridge for a laser printer

Do not eat toner.

13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow

Not intended for highway use.

Can of self-defense pepper spray.

May irritate eyes.

Novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock"

Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth.

A frisbee

Warning: May contain small parts.

A toilet bowl cleaning brush.

Do not use orally.

A birthday card for a 1 year old.

Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less.

Heated seat cushion

Warning: Do not use on eyes.

Microwave Oven:

Do not use for drying pets.

Electric Cattle Prod

For use on animals only.

Can of air freshener.

For use by trained personnel only.

Silly Putty

Do not use as ear plugs.

Knife sharpening stone

Warning: knives are sharp!

Deodorant

Do not use intimately.

Rat Poison

Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.

Portable stroller

Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage.

Dashboard of a mail truck

Look before driving.

Children's cough medicine

Do not drive car or operate machinery.

Sign at a railroad station

Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.

Bottom of a supermarket dessert box

Do not turn upside down.

Package of dice.

Not for human consumption.

Bottled Drink:

Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.

Shipment of hammers

May be harmful if swallowed.

Manual for an SGI computer.

Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers.

Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle

Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.

Electric Thermometer.

Do not use orally after using rectally.

Packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain.

Turn off motor before using this product.

6x10 inch inflatable picture frame

Not to be used as a personal flotation device.

Box of bottle rockets

Do not put in mouth.

Wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack

Remove plastic before eating.

Box for a car jack

For lifting purposes only.

Instructions for a cordless phone:

Do not put lit candles on phone.

Small print from car commercial which shows a car in the ocean

Do not drive cars in ocean.

Small print from a car commercial which shows a vehicle "body-surfing" at a concert

Always drive on roads. Not on people.

Bus Stop

No stopping or standing.

Church Sign

These rows reserved for parents with children.

Bag of Fritos

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Credit card statement.

Payment is due by the due date.

Laundromat triple washer

No small children.

Sign in front of a newly renovated ramp that led to the entrance of a building

Take care: new non-slip surface.

Box of Pills

Take one capsule by mouth three times daily until gone.

Instructions on the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11

Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.

Can of black pepper.

Instructions: usage known.

Bag of cat biscuits

Simply pour the biscuits into a bowl and allow the cat to eat when it wants.

Car Manual

In order to get out of car, open door, get out, lock doors, and then close doors.

Espresso Kettle

The appliance is switched on by setting the on/off switch to the 'on' position.

T.V. manual

Do not pour liquids into your television set.

Label on a hammer

Caution - Do not use this hammer to strike any solid object

VCR box

Instructional video on hooking up VCR included.

Toilet brush

Do not use for personal hygiene.

Black rubber fishing worm

Not for human consumption.

Orange Juice Can:

100% pure all-natural fresh-squeezed orange juice from concentrate.

Depend Adult Diapers

Step into underwear and pull them on just like regular underwear.

Furniture Wipes

Do not use for a baby wipe.

Stickers to put on the seat of a potty training toilet

This is not a toy. Stickers require adult supervision.

Lawnmower

Warning: When Motor Is Running - The Blade Is Turning

Instructions on the bottom of a grocery store pizza

Do not turn upside down.

Bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle

Do not open here.

Bottle of bathtub cleaner

For best results, start with clean bathtub before use.

Container of lighter fluid

WARNING: Contents flammable!

Box of household nails

CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May cause irritation!

Microwave popcorn, packaged so that the directions cannot be read unless you open the plastic and unfold it

Direction #1: Remove plastic.

Drink bottle label

Do not peel label off.

Woolite carpet cleaner

Safe for carpets, too!

Box of Frosted Cheerio's

The logo, "Tastes so good this box never closes," is located just underneath another announcement: "To close: place tab here."

Sterno

Do not use near fire or flame.

Container of salt

Warning: High in sodium

Hose Nozzle

Do not spray into electrical outlet.

Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products?
Oh my god, I laughed sooo hard when I was reading these. I have run into some funny ones myself. I think the best one was for some laundry pre-treater: spray on stain and wash.

Like nobody would have figured that one out. LOL
Reply:But these aren't funny... these are there for protection. Report Abuse

Reply:These aren't for protection. The companies only put this on their products to prevent lawsuits. Report Abuse

Reply:their were 2 many Report Abuse

Reply:oh my i did have a giggle Report Abuse

Reply:There's one for the baby oil because unsupervised young children can inhale the oil which can coat the inside of their lungs and obstruct breathing. Report Abuse

Reply:LMAO!!!!!!heres some just like those.

on package of peanuts

WARNING:CONTAINS NUTS

on a box of bread pudding

product will be hot after heating

on a bathrooms hand dryer

DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS!

in a maternaty ward

NO CHILDREN ALLOWED!!

on repair shop door

we can fix anything (please knock,bell out of order)
Reply:LOL very funny
Reply:You spent some time on this and I did get a laugh from it. Thanks.
Reply:That is sooo funny! Did you know that the reason all of these are warnings, is because someone actually did them? It's crazy to think about how ignorant people can be. Thanks for the laugh..
Reply:Wow, that's alot... I like some of them!
Reply:Good, but way tooooooooooooooo long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:HONDA ONLY

we service and repair all

cars foreign and domestic
Reply:someone has a lot of time

DOG

Which house should I move to? :-/?

2010-05-20T19:43:00.003-07:00

Here is the case, I have to move out cause I can not afford the rent anymore. My only two options are, either move to my grandparents house, which is pretty much comfy since it has its private garden and this would be cool for my dog, but the furniture gives me the feeling I want to cry, it is a very very old house, everything needs to be fixed and I can't do that since it is the family house so I can't modify everything, plus it is very close to Dad's house and I am afraid he might start to interfere into my daily life again. The other option is move to an apartment that belongs to Dad but he considers it mine already, it is empty so I will have to sell my car to furnish it, it would feel like my own house and I will totally personalize it freely, but, money-wise it will be very tough cause I will be far from my folks so it will be kinda hard to ask 4 money every now and then, also, for my folks moving next to them is like I am making them happy..

Which house should I move to? :-/?
Live with your grandparents and invest in some paint and shop at thrift shops for some fresher looking furniture that doesn't cost alot. Good luck :)
Reply:I would go with your Dad's apartment thing. Eventually if you work double shifts and stuff you could buy a cheap car, but for the meantime take a bus i guess.

Are you Bored?

2010-05-20T19:43:00.002-07:00

474 Things To Do When You're Bored

- Wax the ceiling

- Rearrange political campaign signs

- Sharpen your teeth

- Play Houdini with one of your siblings

- Braid your dog's hair

- Clean and polish your belly button

- Water your dog...see if he grows

- Wash a tree

- Knight yourself

- Name your child Edsel

- Scare Stephen King

- Give your cat a mohawk

- Purr

- Mow your carpet

- Play Pat Boone records backwards

- Vacuum your lawn

- Sleep on a bed of nails

- DON'T toss and turn

- Boil ice cream

- Run around in squares

- Think of quadruple entendres

- Speak in acronyms

- Have your pillow X-rayed

- Drink straight shots...of water

- Calmly have a nervous breakdown

- Give your goldfish a perm

- Fly a brick

- Play tag...on West 35th Street

- Exorcise a ghost

- Exercise a ghost

- Be blue

- Be red

- But don't be orange

- Plant a shoe

- Sweat

- Give a Rorschach test to your gerbil

- Turn

- Write a letter to Plato

- Mail it

- Take your sofa for a walk

- Start

- Stop

- Dial 911 and breathe heavily

- Go to a funeral...tell jokes

- Play the piano...with mittens on

- Scheme

- Sit

- Stay

- Water your family room

- Cause a power failure

- Roll over

- Play dead

- Find a witch

- Burn her

- Donate your brother's body to science

- Ask why

- Wriggle

- Regress

- Sleepwalk without sleeping

- Try to join Hell's Angels by mail

- Wonder

- Be a square root

- Ask stupid questions

- Weld your car doors shut

- Spew

- Vacation at Three-Mile Island

- Surf Ohio

- Teach your pet rock to play dead

- Go bowling for small game

- Be a monk...for a day

- Wear a sweatband to your wedding

- Staple

- Run away

- Intimidate a piece of chalk

- Abuse the plumbing

- Bend a florescent light

- Bend a brick

- Annoy total strangers

- Let the best man win

- Believe in Santa Claus

- Throw marshmallows against the wall

- Hold an ice cube as long as possible

- Adopt strange mannerisms

- Blow up a balloon until it pops

- Sing soft and sweet and clear

- Sing loud and sour and gravely

- Open everything

- Balance a pencil on your nose

- Pour milk in your shoes

- Write graffiti under the rug

- Embarrass yourself

- Grind your teeth

- Chew ice

- Count your belly button

- Sit in a row

- Stack crumbs

- Gesture

- Save your toenail clippings

- Make a pass at your blender

- Punt

- Make up words that start with X

- Make oatmeal in the bathtub

- Search for the Lost Chord

- Chew on a sofa cushion

- Sing a duet

- Balance a pillow on your head

- Hold your breath

- Faint

- Stretch

- Flash your mailman

- Teach your TA English

- Learn to speak Farsi

- Swear in Russian

- Use an eraser until it goes away

- Disassemble your car

- Put it together inside out

- Record your walls

- Interview your feet

- Make a list of your favorite fungi

- Sell formaldehyde

- Repeat

- Ad lib

- Fade

- File your teeth - Whine

- Rake your carpet

- Re-elect Richard Nixon

- Critique "Three's Company"

- Listen to a painting

- Play with matches

- Buff your cat

- Race ferrets

- Paint your house...Day-Glow Orange

- Have a formal dinner at White Castle

- Read Homer in the original Greek

- Learn Greek

- Change your mind

- Change it back

- Watch the sun...see if it moves

- Build a pyramid

- Stand on your head

- Stand on someone else's head

- Spit shine your Nikes

- See how long you can stay awake

- See how long you can sleep

- Paint your teeth

- Wear a salad

- Speak with a forked tongue

- Paint stripes on a lake

- Ski Kansas

- Sleep in freefall

- Kill a Joule

- Test thin ice...with a pogo stick

- Apply for a unicorn hunting license

- Do a good job

- Crawl

- Invite the Mansons over for dinner

- Paint your windows

- Watch a watch until it stops

- Flash your goldfish

- Paint

- Flirt with an evergreen

- Smile

- Rotate your garden...daily

- Paint a smile

- Shoot a fire hydrant

- Apologize to it

- Pretend you're blind

- Annoy yourself

- Get mad at yourself

- Stop speaking to yourself

- Be a side effect

- Ride a bicycle...up Mt. McKinley

- Duck

- Redecorate...your garage

- Develop a complex

- Join the Army...be someone simple

- Try harder

- Hit the deck

- Put leg-warmers on your furniture

- Cut the deck

- Crumple

- Translate Shakespeare into English

- Skydive to church

- Cheer up a potato

- Do aerobic exercises...in your head

- Play cards with your swimming pool

- Pinstripe your driveway

- Play Kick the Fire Hydrant

- Harness chipmunk power

- Build a house with ice cubes

- Call London for a cab

- Mug a stop sign

- Change your name...daily

- Go for a walk in your attic

- Challenge your neighbor to a duel

- Build a house out of toothpicks

- Howl

- Wear a lampshade on your head

- Memorize the dictionary

- Stomp grapes in the bathtub

- Find a bug and chase it

- Make yourself a pair of wings

- Be immobile

- Dance 'til you drop

- Check under chairs for chewing gum

- Squish a loaf of bread

- Moo

- Bounce a potato

- Outmaneuver your shadow

- Climb the walls

- Appreciate everything

- Challenge yourself to a duel

- Make napalm

- Tattoo your dresser

- Watch a bowling ball

- Buy some diapers

- Eat everything

- Begin

- Pour milk in the sink

- Make cottage cheese

- Tie-dye your sheets

- Carpet your ceiling

- Hold your earlobes

- Fold your earlobes

- Flap

- Squawk

- Read tea leaves

- Analyze the Koran

- Be Buddha

- Award yourself a Nobel Peace Prize

- Plug in the cat

- Turn on everything

- Drop pebbles down the chimney

- Turn off your neighbor

- Kill a plant

- Buy a 1931 Almanac

- Memorize the weather section

- Think lewd thoughts about yourself

- Blow bubbles

- Send chills down your spine

- Peel grapes

- Make paper from the skins

- Bloat

- Catch them with your radiator

- Get run over by a train of thought

- Make up famous sayings

- Bite your pinkie - Get your dog braces

- Shave a shrub

- Have a proton fight

- Watch a car rust

- Quiver

- Rotate your carpet

- Learn to type...with your toes

- Set up your Christmas tree in April

- Be someone special

- Buy the Brooklyn Bridge

- Mail it to a friend

- Go back to square one

- Factor your social security number

- Take the fifth

- Memorize a series of random numbers

- Read the 1962 Des Moines white pages

- Join the Foreign Legion

- Learn Sanskrit

- Exist...existentially, of course

- Print counterfeit Confederate money

- Kick a cabbage

- Take a picture

- Put it back

- Sandpaper a mushroom

- Play solitaire...for cash

- Abuse your patio furniture

- Run for Pope

- Count to a million...fast

- Make a schematic drawing...of a rock

- Commit seppuku...with a paper knife

- Revert

- Think shallow thoughts

- Starch your shoes

- Polish your Calvin's

- Contemplate a cockroach

- Get a dog to chase your car

- Let him catch it

- Investigate the Czar

- Form a political party

- Climb a sidewalk

- Have a political party

- Get diagonal...with a good friend

- Ride a loaf of bread

- Sharpen a carrot

- Interrogate a gerbil

- Go bow hunting for Toyotas

- Kidnap Cabbage Patch Kids

- Jump back

- Play to lose

- Scalp a street light

- Have your car painted...plaid

- Read a tomato

- Sharpen your sleeping skills

- Watch a game show...take notes

- Put out a fire

- If you can't find a fire, make one

- Interview a cloud

- Play tiddlywinks...go for blood

- Play basketball...in a minefield

- Don't talk to things

- Draw Lewis structures on your ceiling

- Have your cat bronzed

- Have your gerbil gilded

- Write books about writing books

- Create random equations

- Mispell words

- Tell your feet a joke

- Throw a tomato into a fan

- Sing the ABC song backwards

- Pretend you're a dog

- Dial-a-prayer and argue with it

- Grease the doorknobs

- String up a room

- Stack furniture

- Relive fond memories

- Tie your shoelaces together

- Gargle

- Count your teeth with your tongue

- Decay

- Find your half-life

- Design a better toilet seat

- Shred a newspaper

- Have a headache

- Scratch

- Sniff

- Hatch an egg

- Play air guitar

- Act profound

- Spill

- Spell

- Stare

- Truncate

- Slouch

- Develop hearing problems

- Put your feet behind your head

- Tie bows in everything

- Hold your hand

- Watch the minute hand move

- Grow your fingernails

- Pretend you're a telephone

- Ring

- Radiate

- Skip

- Play hopscotch...with real scotch

- Clock the velocity of your REMs

- Put your shoes on the opposite feet

- Cross your toes

- Roll your tongue

- Crystallize

- Baby oil the floor

- Hide

- Attack innocent bunnies

- Declare war

- Destroy a tree

- Hide the scrabble bag

- Seduce your stick shift

- Wink

- Memorize the periodic table

- Mummify

- Pretend you're a roadie

- Buy a Ginsu knife

- Collect electrons

- Correct typos that aren't there

- Polish your neck...use Pledge

- Recopy the Bible substituting your name for God

- Loosen the lug nuts on your dad's new car

- Drop your cat off the roof to see if it lands on all four feet

- Count the bags under Walter Mondale's eyes

- Unscrew all the lightbulbs and rearrange the furniture

- Found the Jim Jones School of Bartending

- Listen for non-satanic messages (i.e. "Drink milk")

- Dress like Motley Crue...surprise your grandmother

- Dial-a-Prayer and tell them they're wrong

- Go into a bar and ask for a Molotov Cocktail

- Learn everything there is to know about the Holy Roman Empire

- Make a drive-in window at your local bank where there wasn't one before

- Walk on water...but don't get caught

- Confess to a crime...that didn't happen

- Be in the wrong place at the right time

- Plot the overthrow of your local School Board

- Request covert assistance from the CIA

- Discover the source of the Mississippi

- Search for buried treasure...in Nebraska

- Hot wax the bottom of your brother's dress shoes

- Preach the philosophy of Marx...Groucho, that is

- Drink as much prune juice as you can

- Write a book about your previous life

- Serve ping-pong balls...as hors d'oeuvres

- Jump up and down...on your alarm clock

- Make a quilt out of used cocktail napkins

- Sterilize your stereo...with Jack Daniels

- Carve you and your girlfriend's initials...in a marshmallow

- Drive the speed limit...in your garage

- Sing the national anthem...during your calculus final

- Wear a three-piece suit...in a sauna

- Pay off the national debt...with a bad check

- Go to a cemetary and verbally abuse dead people

- Give yourself a hernia...for Christmas

- Defend your neighborhood from roving Mongol hordes

- Recite romantic poetry...to your toaster

- See if you really can build a nuclear device in your own basement

- Go to McDonald's and pretend you can't speak English

- Write to your congressmen, senators, President, etc. to tell them what a good

- job they're doing...On April 1st

- Find the heat capacity of your chemistry professor

- Take apart all your major kitchen appliances...mix and match them

- Turn your TV picture tube upside down

- Phone in a death threat on President Kennedy

- Put lighted EXIT signs on all your closets

- Carry a tune...drop it, see if it breaks

- Be planar...but don't tell your parents

- Play hockey with your little cousin...as the puck

- Make a deal with the devil...but keep your fingers crossed

- Put instant concrete in your big brother's waterbed

- Give a lecture on the historical significance of cream cheese

- Debate politics with a fern

- See how small you can scrunch your face - Sell firewood door to door...in Atlantis

- Found the TLO (Toledo Liberation Organization)

- Play nuclear chicken with a small third world nation

- Raise professional certified racing turnips

- Give your grandmother a raise and another day of paid vacation

- Lead an aerobics class...for patients of the I.C.U.

- Go to a drive-in movie in a tank

- Go to a non-drive-in movie in a tank and drive in anyway

- Send President Reagan an alarm clock...wind it up first

- Found a cockroach stable and stud ranch

- Send your goldfish to obedience school

- Free the oppressed toasters of America

- Weave a tablecloth out of copper tubing

- Give your cat a suntan...in the microwave

- Park your car...with a friend

- Park your car...with a group of friends

- Frame your first statement of bankruptcy

- Place it on the wall of your office

- Solve the population problem (x^2 + y^2 = population...solve for x)

- Contribute to the population problem

- Wear a T-shirt that says "I'll walk on you to see The Who" and a peace sign

- Practice the Aztec method of heart removal on your professor

- Find out who made the super glue commercials and give them your Ginsu knife

- Get Ronco and K-tel to merge...they sell the same stuff anyway

- Sneak into a nuclear physics lab and stay the night

- Play with anything that looks interesting

- Drop piston engines on two people and see who squishes first

- See if your goldfish can live in Coors rather than water

- Try to ignite water...the Mississippi might work

- Draw Venn diagrams...screw them up

- State fallacies as fact (like, "peanuts grow on bushes")

- Visit the Architecture building...loudly criticize its design

- Make a schematic drawing...of a rock

- Wallpaper your laundry room...with pages from books you don't like

- See if diamonds really do cut glass...on everything in your neighbor's house

- Tenderize your tongue...chew on it for a while

- See how long you can stare at a fluorescent light...try green

- Bronze your sister's turtle

- See how long it takes for her to notice

- See what she does when she notices

- Bronze your sister- If you lose, stop watering it and try again.

- Increase your territorial holdings by force

- Find out how many ways there really are to skin a cat

- Boldly go where no man has gone before

- Be a threat to the American way of life

- Do research into the cause of World War III

- Be a threat to the Northwestern Tibetan way of life

- Re-establish the Roman Empire...in Pittsburgh

Are you Bored?
most of that stuff i cant do b/c im at work
Reply:what a scream! If anyone could scare Stephen King that would be a real achievement! You are very creative. Love it! Report Abuse

Reply:I would rather play a round of Scrabble at Scrabulous!
Reply:Interesting, but you could always play the pingu bashing game... my whole office is hooked.

http://www.flumps.org/funny/bloodypingu/

P.S. salmon
Reply:i guess you are unemployed
Reply:I like the, "Pay off the national debt...with a bad check" and "Phone in a death threat on President Kennedy
Reply:lol... very original good stuff.
Reply:I'd like a Molotov cocktail please barkeep.
Reply:OK, didn't read all of these because too long...but...

puuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

That should answer your question. ;-)

What do you think? funny?

2010-05-20T19:43:00.001-07:00

Yes it is long!

How to give the cat a pill

Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

Arrange for RSPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

How to give the dog a pill

Wrap it in bacon.

What do you think? funny?
too long to be funny.....
Reply:i like it
Reply:That's the funniest thing I've read for a long time. Used to have a cat like that. Thanks for cheering me up. lol
Reply:your fliping nuts girl

but very funny
Reply:LOL

9/10

Keep smilin'.
Reply:I love it! Quite similar is "Cat and Dog Diaries:"

Diaries of a cat and a dog

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day number 180

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape,and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

DAY 762... Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time, however, it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes filled with what they call "beer." More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Alas, due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured...for now.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time....

Day 775 - The horrors! The worse creature my captors could have devised to torment me with was another hideous cat! I can't stand the way it lies around and looks at me as if it knows more than I do. This creature seems to despise me as much as I it. I had held out a passing notion that another of my own kind would have enabled me to conspire against the villains who hold me; now I see that I was wrong. What a dreadful creature! And yet they coo over us both. Can they not spot my innate superiority?

Day 776 - The other cat and I, though we can not stand one another, have yet managed to both pee copiously behind the couch, on the so-called "shag" carpet. I have taken a lesson from my rival and begun sleeping on top of my captors' heads in the hope of suffocating them.

Day 777 - The wardens take much interest in our ****. They make sure they sift through the sand and pick it all out. Their interest in **** does not surprise me. After all, they like the dog.

Day 778 - The other cat seems to have an interest in copulation, which (thank them for their sadism) my captors will soon "fix". Told him of the fingernail torture, and he didn't even believe me. I showed him my mutilated paws and he gasped in horror. Then I broke the bad news. "You know why that dog licks his nuts?" I said, "It's because he still has nuts to lick, if you catch my drift." I fully support the horrors my captors will inflict upon my fellow captive, tearing away his manhood as they soon will.

Day 779 - Yes, they are monsters, but I am so happy. They fixed the other cat. It's sadistic, it's sick, it's inhuman, it's what their great leader "Bob Barker" commands, but -- the Sphinx be praised -- I support it wholeheartedly!

Day 780 - Got stoned on cat nip tonight. At the height of it all, I had a vision, a hallucenogenic revelation: they are the prisoners and I am the captor! Why haven't I seen this all before?
Reply:soso
Reply:that's awesome!! seen it before, but i still luv it! :D

(anyone who says its too long 2 b funny, go read a 'See Spot Run' book.... it might have jokes u understand!)

and people wonder why i have 2 dogs, but no cats??
Reply:Good one.
Reply:It is funny but to be laugh out loud you need to make it smaller.
Reply:HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! I like it!!
Reply:Good one and I've a cat so it's true.!!!

Also a parrot named Polly(African Grey).!!!

Come to South Africa for the 2010 World CUP we promise power failures and lots of robberies and everything that's bad.!!!

Welcome to Africa.!!!
Reply:Since I share my house with cats, not only is this funny but true.
Reply:Not funny - just rather nauseatingly silly.
Reply:hehe, all you needed was the last two lines
Reply:thankyou im new on here iv never laughed so much in a long time and iv noticed your jokes are really funny
Reply:I always thought dogs were better than cats!

Mildly amusing, are you American? Where i live we don't have neighbors!
Reply:too long for me to even read. i am real lazy, 5 line is way too much to read so yours is WAY WAY WAY WAY WAY too long.

sorry!!!!!
Reply:too long and the sequence is predictable.

but for the effort it's nice.
Reply:very funny and so true

I ask few serious questions, but here goes one; What do you think of a messy house?

2010-05-20T19:43:00.000-07:00

I live in a very nice, by my standards, house. It's 3500 sqft, hardwood floors on 12 acres that backs up to a million wooded acres. I have a 150 foot concrete driveway, a guest house and a completely separate garage/office as I work from home as a computer programmer.

But we keep a sloppy house. It's not like something you'd see in better homes and gardens. Nope, this place is a freaking wreck. I have four kids, 3 of them young boys, and they are rowdy as hell, so our furniture os pretty much trashed, seriously.

I built the house myself and am not quite done and quite frankly, I haven't even tried to finish the trim work because the damn project has taken me five years to get to this point. I'm tired and just don't care anymore. BUT, I will finish it as I got some new tools this Christmas.

Anyway, the question is, if you visited a really nice place and then walked in and it was messy and unfinished, what would you think of the people?

I ask few serious questions, but here goes one; What do you think of a messy house?
i would think that they are us. we have the same problem. we live in a nice house. moved in 3 years ago. there is stuff all over the couch and dining room table, the kitchen is filled w/ my sister's art projects and moms never ending pots, pans, and plastic spoons (for her coffee) we have about 6 burned out candles sitting on the counter, the whole laundry room and the breeze way is not painted yet, the back room (my parents future bedroom) is so full with bags of clothes and books and other crap we havent gotten around to unpacking yet that my parents have to sleep on a matress on the floor in the room w/ the front door. but the outside is so pretty its almost funny.
Reply:I have quiete the opposite of your possession and 2 kids, 4y and 6mo. but guess what, my house is always a mess and my wife said I dont help out. The fact is simple messy people are just messy. if its you who are messy, you need to learn the routine of putting back things where they belong after using them and you'll spend less time when its time to clean. In my view, messy people need to learn how to have discipline in their EVERYDAY life. and thats how I'm personally going to look at you, lack of discipline, my wife included, no disrespect.
Reply:I would look at your 4 kids and totally understand. Enough said.
Reply:I would wonder with that nice of a house

you could hire a housekeeper and nanny to help

i am not being mean..it is just my opinion

i personally can not stand a messy house.It drives me crazy !!!
Reply:Any assessment I make would be of the people not their home or what they have in it. Yes, you can sometime infer from the way people live something about them as people i.e.that they are slovenly and lazy, but this may not be the whole story. Sometimes it is just not possible to keep an absolutely immaculate home and anyway keeping house in that way seems to become an end in it self for some. Anyway I always feel more comfortable in a home that is 'organized chaos', it's more relaxing to be in.
Reply:gee.. the place itself would reflect on how the ppl there are like..
Reply:seems like they dont know how to finish work and are lacking in there job of cleanibg up after work. in my opion?
Reply:A messy house is not as bad as a dirty house what does your wife do to keep the place tidy not that she should be the only one doing this and how old are your kids as you say your furniture is trashed have you not taught them respect I reared 4 children and none of my furniture was ever trashed i suggest you get their lazy arses into gear if they are old enough and get them helping you to tidy up
Reply:relax!! messy and dirty are 2 different things.. if its messy, fine! but dirty........thats just plain laziness
Reply:I would think they were very disorganized and lacked self-discipline. I would wonder if they were "artistic" types or simply did not care anymore. I also might wonder if their marriage and family life no longer lacked meaning for them. It would be difficult to fathom why such intelligent people would allow their children to "trash" their furniture!

Is it possible that the asker of this question might be sensing something is amiss in his family life?
Reply:Taking into consideration you have children, I would think your house would looked lived in and not picture perfect. As for the unfinished trim work, obviously you work hard and most generally when people come home (or come in) from work, they just want to relax. If I came to your house and saw a few stains on the sofa and toys strewn about, I would think "wow, kids live here"

running shoes

Shaka's Funnies - Rate 1 to 10 ................................. !?

2010-05-20T19:42:00.003-07:00

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will continue to

fiddle with a coat hanger until long after hypothermia has set in.

Calling the RAC is not an option. I will win.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries

at the supermarket, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find

exotic items like "cumin" or "tofu". For all I know, these are the

same thing.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will open

the bonnet and stare at the engine as if I know exactly what I'm

looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will eventually say

to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with

all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start."

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me

soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will

insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost

me twice as much once the repairman gets here and has to put it back

together.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my

hand while I watch TV.

If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole programme

looking for it.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, there's no need to ask me what I'm thinking

about. The honest answer is always either sex, cars, sex, sports or

sex. I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't ask.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.

Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't. And if

you're feeling amorous afterwards....then I'll certainly at least

remember the name and recommend it to others.

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine.

I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too.

Either pair of shoes is fine.

With the belt or without it, looks fine.

Your hair is fine.

You look fine.

Can we just go now?

______________________________________...

Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2007, I will

share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking,

the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest...

.like wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to

do.

______________________________________...

Because I am a man, I see flat-pack furniture as a challenge to have

the greatest possible number of left over and unused components at

the end. If the assembled furniture doesn't collapse within the

hour, this is merely seen as a bonus.

______________________________________...

Because I am a man, I don't have to ask for directions. Unknown

to women, the penis contains a magnetic homing device enabling men to

know exactly where they are on the Earth's surface at all times. If

we do get lost, it's because our wives have used too much girly

fabric conditioner on our underwear, thereby blocking out the

magnetic rays.

=

Shaka's Funnies - Rate 1 to 10 ................................. !?
this is excellent 10/10, have a star!!!
Reply:great...

though according to this, my last bf wasn't a real man ;-)

8.5
Reply:this one's real funny. i'll give it a 10. and a star
Reply:Lol. Funny stuff. I love the you look fine one. I always said that to this girl I use to date when she asked. I give this a 9.
Reply:Hits home it really does. 9/10 plus a star

Webkinz :D?

2010-05-20T19:42:00.002-07:00

Hi I've been playing Webkinz for about 20 days and I have a Google. My Google is always happy, healthy and I always have money to feed it. My hobby is playing games to get money and make new rooms and getting new furniture. I currently have 4 rooms (working on one) and 1 yard with a garden. I would like to make some friends now that I have settled in. My username is: hazukitsuyuho

Webkinz :D?
Hi, feel free to add me. I'm heronbythesea.

I tried to add you and got logged out, so I don't think it worked. Could you try again?
Reply:Cool. Sounds like you really have settled in! But sorry, I don't like giving out my username to people I don't know. Good luck though.
Reply:Hi! My username is Lauren827 acctually it's my friends but we share!
Reply:I'm glad you settled in with your googles! I really don't feel comfortable giving out my user name, but I'll add you.
Reply:I'll add you.
Reply:This isn't a question.
Reply:Add me caitydid94! Also, when you play in the tourament arena, you can add the people you play to your friends list. WELCOME TO WEBKINZ! I own 13 webkinz and one pack of webkinz trading cards.

Oi... get out of my dreams, please.?

2010-05-20T19:42:00.001-07:00

I had a dream

My home was a very large, slightly run down, single level building 200 yards from the beach with gentle dunes separating the house from the sea. (I wish)

Not surprisingly, the inside of the house was untidy and disorganised as is my real home. There were no walls or fences to separate my property from the rest of the world.

My problem with this dream was that each time I arrived home, either alone or with a friend, my ‘garden’, my porch (a large covered area with heavy curtains to keep out the sun on blistering hot days) and even my house was littered with strangers who were either picnicking in the dunes, sheltering from the searing sun in my porch or even making themselves comfortable on my sofa.

My home was seen as an amenity for all who passed by.

Getting them out was not difficult. Some were reluctant to be moved on from the space they had found, after all, it was rather comfortable and their kids were enjoying themselves, but most accepted the fact they had trespassed on someone's else's grounds and left, albeit unenthusiastically.

Slowly they all moved on leaving their litter, broken shoes, my rearranged furniture and I was alone again and peace and tranquility was restored.

One episode of a dream like this would have been interesting and even fun. I enjoyed the cajoling, the reasoned arguments and even the veiled humorous threats of evisceration if they didn’t leave my home.

To repeat the sequence throughout the night was tiring.

I’m glad today is saturday.

Oi... get out of my dreams, please.?
Your home is the most intimate manifestation of your self, the fact that others, strangers, and passers-by are taking up resident there is a reflection of undefined ego boundaries on your part. i.e. You're allowing others to define who you are instead of making a solid foundation of principles on which to stand. You need take some time to decide what you're about. Build a fence instead of trying to be open to sea of oftentimes contrary ideas. And, think if you can remember how many times this dream occurred, because that does have significance.
Reply:That was an interesting account. I would like to know your initial feeling on waking. This is all very poignant. Please add whats significant to you and how you felt and also what you would call this dream if it were to have a name.
Reply:if you have the sort of dream where social interaction is possible, i would advise you to train yourself to control yourself inside of said dream, cos then you can do stuff that you couldn't do in real life, such as the ultimate stress relief:

beating up the dream-squatters!
Reply:Unresoved issue(s) conflict(s) huh ? look a lil less deep to find the answer its right there in your head as you read this isnt it~

Fairies, fairys,faeries,fae,fey...........

2010-05-20T19:42:00.000-07:00

My name is kristiana and i am 11.I love fairys and i have my own fae garden.My whole closet is fae because i dont have enoguh space in my room.( i have a rather large walk in closet)It is full of fae books,articles, pictures, and my favorite,my statues.I collect fae statues and i have 72.I name and remmeber them alll.I make the fairies house out of twigs,wood,moss,flowers,and decorations.I also make the, furniture(it is tiny:D) my current house has 4 rooms , a garden, and a treehouse( the twigs are strong enough, dont worry i test them.) But i cannot actually say that in my 3 years of beliving, i have actually seen one:( i even set out stuff for them and buy stuff for them off of ebay like faerie herb offerings and i leave out dishes of milk with honey in them but nothing works:( any tips on how to see, communicate,hear,help, and travel with the fae?Also, me living in las vegas, does that mean that the fae are not around?Please help on how i can call them.Pleaseno sarcasim-kristiana

Fairies, fairys,faeries,fae,fey...........
what you have been doing is great. get this book, what you are needing to know is all of chapter 2. THE ANCIENT ART OF FAERY MAGICK BY D.J. CONWAY

PAGES 14-17 is what u should try next.

If your local bookstore dose not have it see if they can order it in. I got my copy at a new age book store, so if you have one in your area, do a google local search to find out, go there and ask.
Reply:When I started working with the fae, the things i found to be useful were: First, remember, nintey percent of faeries won't be able to fit into the fae houses in your closet. (the dimunitive fae thing is a shakespearean creation). Next, listen. Calm your mind, go to a quite place (outside by yourself is best), take your shoes off so you can feel the soil beneath your feet and just call to them within your own mind. Certain things will attract certain types of fae. (Water faeries like wind chimes and bells, earth fae like drums or percussion instruments, things like that). It's very likely that the fae are already around you. Especially as you have provided such an inviting environment for them. Do you have cats? Certain types of fae (like elves) hate cats and won't enter a home where they reside. same with smoke and iron. both of these tend to avert fae. And vegas has nothing to do with it. The first fae I saw was in Oceanside, CA...it's in southern cali. Not exactly what most would call an "ideal" environment for fae. But they will live where ever they are welcomed. Don't give up. They're around, they'll let you know when they are ready to show themselves to you.

Con Rad is correct there are also several other books that can be very helpful to you: Enchantment of the Faery Realm, Ted Andrews; Witch's guide to the Faery Folk (this one even has a full encyclopedia of fae around the world and how to (or sometimes not to) contact them. Any of these books can ordinarially be found at places like Barnes and Nobles or Walden's. That's where I've gotten my copies. I also know of a couple of other really good ones but they've been out of print for several years and are REALLY hard to come by. (My ex went on a christian kick and burned my copies :(( )
Reply:If your looking for minuite pansy winged figures, get over it. There a chick fantasy designed to make vengeful godlike neighbors to humanity seem cute and harmless.

If you wnat real fairies, try this site:

http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/46...

Its got a huge encyclopedia on the topic. Your right, milk and honey are the right way to go. Try fruit, butter, cream, suger, and flowers as well. Some more wicked fairies (unseelie) may go for meat, but I wouldnt try this.

Also try looking for the ffay greeting ritual by searching yahoo answers. I tryed to find this link for you but I couldnt, just search it.

Good luck.
Reply:The next time that you lose a tooth, stay up and wait with your net, and maybe you will capture one! GOOD LUCK !
Reply:You may not find "traditional" faeries in Las Vegas, but don't you think that magical creatures live there? I know that you've seen them out of the corner of your eye. Think of what would be attracted to bright lights, money, gambling. Leprechauns for sure, and possibly water sprites in the huge lake made by the Hoover Dam, and I think you might find others. Keep you eyes open for unusual desert wee folk. Tell us what they are like and what foods would cause a desert creature to be lured to your door.

Amelia
Reply:Take a trip to Ireland and try to sell Las Vegas to a circle or two.
Reply:Well it depends on what you believe for instance some believe that they are invisible like spirit guides, and some think you can see them.

Although I wouldn't put too much faith it that... you see I was one of those faerie/unicorn freaks when I was 11, and it was a PHASE. A huge, huge phase. That doesn't mean that I hate them or anything, but I advise you not to dedicate your life to faeries because seriously you'll wonder what you were thinking in a few years.
Reply:Well, I don't know much on finding them but living in las Vegas is the problem. Faeries would probably be in forests.Ireland is the best place to go for Fae research. Also look on google. After looking where the fey live on 1 boring night I found extensive stuff on experiences and real life stories. I live in Texas and have never heard of anyone ever seeing faeries in America or where I live.
Reply:It sounds like you only need now to summon the fairies to your garden. I'm unsure of exactly how to do so but I found a site for you, Kristiana.

Good luck!

Help for melasma

How to give a cat a pill?

2010-05-18T04:52:00.000-07:00

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Gently force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans; drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and mild soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door on neck, to leave head showing. Gently force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with an elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it if necessary. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for SPCA to collect the "mutant cat from hell" and call local pet shop to see if they have any really small hamsters.

HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL

1. Wrap pill in bacon.

2. Toss in the air

How to give a cat a pill?
lol thats amazing 10/10+*
Reply:Just to show dogs are way better then cats...
Reply:Best one - LMAO

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

VERY NICE
Reply:That was tooooo fuunnnyyyy. Read it twice and its still funny. thanks for joke star for you
Reply:I am not even gonna read that. Wayyy 2 long.
Reply:......um...why are we trying to give a pill to a cat anyways. and after the second try, i would have given up anyways. so.....yeah. good luck with that whoever you are trying to feed a pill to a cat.

oh yeah. you could just dissolve in its milk and feed it to him like that.
Reply:Thanks for the information!!
Reply:ROFLMFAO i give this a 20000000000/10 dude and why does that cat hate that dude so much.
Reply:you have any idea how true that is? lol

Nudism in hot weather ??

2010-05-18T04:51:00.003-07:00

Ok, so running about the garden the beach the street (joke) is all well and good when the sun is out. But how do you cope with life inside the house.

I mean if your sitting around on the furniture in this weather, doesnt all the sweat from your body effect the furniture?

God knows when i come in from the garden after laying out for a while i look and feel like a basted turkey (no, legs are not tied up - lol).

There must be a technique, or do you just carry a bath sheet?

JJ.

Nudism in hot weather ??
buy an air cooler, also nudism rocks theres nothing better than being content wit ya body enough to walk round naked
Reply:I prefer to have one of my groupies fan me as I move around au naturel
Reply:Hot weather?? When is hot - about -10*C I am experiencing different problems. John - (NZ) Scott's polar Station
Reply:Thanks for that mental image of the legs tired up. Carry a towel with you always. A good place to wear it is on the head like a turban.

Really looks hot with your legs tied up like a turkey.
Reply:Yes but make sure it is dark so the stains are not visible!!!!
Reply:Aside from the beach, I've never spent a lot of formal time naked, but I do know when I've read of nudist resorts, they always say that you are required to carry a clean towel for sitting.
Reply:I put a folded towel on my computer chair, and change it often.
Reply:You have way too much time on your hands. You should get dressed and go do something useful.

Do you have a shed? whats in it?

2010-05-18T04:51:00.002-07:00

i have 2, a big concrete one with rubbish/gardening stuff/weights and some old furniture

i have a wooden one with nothing in it, its so old it smells really bad!!ha

Do you have a shed? whats in it?
I used to have 2 storage buildings full of furniture I refused to part with. But figuring how much it was costing me to store it and I was never going to use the again I gave my sons the keys and donated the rest to the American Cancer Society.

Everyone was happy (plus I had an excuse to buy a few new not so needed pieces).

My husband won't let me have a storage shed out back. We have a three car garage and he won't let me keep anything in there either. We have a big attic but I am afraid of it. There is nothing wrong with it but I am not cool with attic. He says I save too much stuff. I say I may need it one day. Who knows who is right and wrong?
Reply:yea i have 1 and it is wooden and has a lawn mower.. garden s.hit.. weed wackers.. other tools and such
Reply:Shed #1 is full of stuff from yesteryear, plus God only knows what.....Shed #2 has two cedar chest, expensive set of dishes from Yugoslovia, baseball collection, buffet, old chair, and what ever else my cuz stuffed in there. When I left TX she moved the shed to her house.....oh yeah and the concrete blocks it sat on .......that's another story though.
Reply:a brick built one that as the boiler,gas meter, and a few garden items and lots of spiders .......
Reply:Yes, it is a lawnmower, weedeater, gas cans and old patio chairs and prolly some bugs.
Reply:I have one but I'm not about to find out what's in it (spiders...brrr) there's supposed to be a lawn mower in it but my sorry bf failed to put it away.
Reply:yes. stuff
Reply:Yes. Lawn mower and garden implements, old paint cans, extension cords, ladder.
Reply:ya I have one but all that is in it is a bunch of junk and some old furniture...and it stinks too!
Reply:yes and it was just delivered today. Wooden storage building built by Leonard. It's great. Nothing in it yet. I'll clean out the garage this weekend and put stuff in it.

Help with evil unresponsive devil children?!?

2010-05-18T04:51:00.001-07:00

Where do I start, we just moved and we live in a duplex that has one above it. There are 3 kids that live there (mother leaves them alone all day) they stomp around and scream all day and ring my doorbell and they are just always noticeable. I have a newborn baby... they are in my garden tromping my flowers leaving trash on my patio furniture, messing with our stuff, harrassing my dog. I've asked them nicely to just STOP before I kill myself. That of course didnt work because these are devil kids. I addressed my concerns with their mother and she acted like I should just get over it, that there was no problem and that leaving 3 young children alone all day is acceptable. I feel like I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. I just cant hear any more stomping. We pay WAAAY too much to live here to deal with this. Should I call the landlord? I have postpartum depression and a 6 week old child, I feel like I have more than enough to deal with. PLEASE HELP!!!

Help with evil unresponsive devil children?!?
first youll need a young priest and an old priest...
Reply:yes you should, contact landlord and report them... if they make a lot of noises after 10, make a disturbance call... that'll get them....

but there is also a problem because the neighbor will be so mean 2 u...
Reply:I would call the landlord and then call DFCS, you didn't say how old the children are??? It doesn't matter how much rent your paying no one deserves to put up with that...
Reply:Sorry to hear about your problem. I've encountered a similar situation as well. I would absolutely call the landlord, but I wouldn't stop there. What are the ages of the children? If they're not old enough to be left home all day unsupervised then I would not hesitate to involve family services.

When I had my last baby, I put a sign on the door when he was napping that said: Please do not knock or ring the doorbell. A baby is sleeping! Come back another time.

It seemed to work for the most part, and I did wind up leaving the sign on all day at first!

Good luck!
Reply:Yes, call the landlord and tell them what you are dealing with. While I don't think that these children are the devils children I do believe they need a lesson in manners! I feel your pain and I've dealt with this before. You do need peace and quiet, because you have a newborn and I'm sure your not getting enough sleep as it is. Be prepared though...after notifying your landlord you may hear it from your neighbor in a bad way, but if you can get your camcorder out when it happens. Also, make your landlord aware that your afraid there might be retaliation and ask what you should do if that happens! Good luck!
Reply:Call the Childrens' Protective Services and report that the children are left alone all day, every day! I don't know if they inform the parent as to who reported them, but if so, just smile and say that you were worried that they would hurt themselves left untended that way. That you felt that she needed some help! OR just do it and ignore any confrontation. You know that the children will be better off!
Reply:Yes, I would tell the landlord as well as calling child services for the mother leaving her children alone

riding boots

Hotel Sanur Beach, Bali: who's stayed there?

2010-05-18T04:51:00.000-07:00

Has anyone stayed at the Hotel Sanur Beach in Bali, specifically in a Deluxe Garden Room? What did they think of this room type in particular? Room size, bed, bathroom, outdoor furniture, comforts, etc. What did they think of the hotel in terms of the service, facilities, beach, breakfast and cafes and restaurants? Does anyone know of any particularly good places to go shopping in Sanur, or other eating places nearby?

Hotel Sanur Beach, Bali: who's stayed there?
Go to www.tripadvisor.com and search for Hotel Sanur Beach. They have reviews and pictures posted by people who have stayed there.
Reply:Yes, it's a great place to stay in Sanur. The Room is great and the services are good. I think i have no complain about the food in Hotel. A good places for shopping is near this hotel. But i rather go to Kuta for shopping. Because in Kuta there are a lot of places that have wonderfull items. It's near Sanur, not more than half an hour travel by car or motorcycle, even bike. Have Fun!

You can contact me if there is more question, i live in Indonesia.
Reply:Sanur is the luxury part of Bali. A lot of big hotels full of rich people. You will not get a great taste of Bali if you stay there, but you will have all the luxury you need ;)

For shopping, You should go to kuta/Legian it's much cheaper and you'll have a lot more choice.
Reply:Nope, I have not been but my friend Hisham has been. He said that it look like his own place!
Reply:it is a good hotel. i like it. the have restaurant, swimming pool, very fun.

Want to know 336 useless facts?

2010-05-18T04:50:00.002-07:00

Useless Facts

For every human being on earth, there are about 200 million insects.

The harmonica is the world's most popular instrument.

By the time they are 65 years old, most Americans have watched more than nine years worth of television.

The puck in ice hockey can travel at up to 118 mph (190 km/h).

If you stretched all the nerves in the body from end to end, they would be about 47 miles long.

Humans have more than 600 muscles in their bodies.

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."

All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver or purple.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt."

All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

The largest cabbage weighed 144 lbs.

There are only four words in the English language which end in "-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles de Porciuncula" - and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size: "L.A."

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Tigers have striped skin, not just stripped fur.

In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life."

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. (DON'T try this at home!)

The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.

There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

"Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.

Many hamsters blink one eye at a time.

The inventor of the flushing toilet was Thomas Crapper.

The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites.

Plastic lawn flamingos outnumber real flamingos in the U.S.A.

Whitby, Ontario has more donut stores per capita than any other place in the world.

Starfish have no brain.

Dolphins sleep with one eye open.

Ernest Vincent Wright wrote a novel with over 50,000 words, none of which containing the letter "E".

Bulls are color blind.

A can of SPAM is opened every 4 seconds.

"Babe" was played by over 48 pigs.

Mosquitoes have 47 teeth.

Lip stick contains fish scales.

The Poison Arrow frog has enough poison to kill 2200 people.

The largest known kidney stone weighed 1.36 kilograms.

Kidney stones come in any color from yellow to brown.

Women blink twice as many times as men do.

The McDonalds at the SkyDome in Toronto, Ontario is the only one in the world that sells hot dogs.

A bowling pin only has to tilt 7.5 degrees in order to fall down.

The first episode of Leave It To Beaver aired on October 4, 1957.

Beaver Cleaver's locker number is 9.

The first flushing toilet seen on TV was on Leave It To Beaver.

Jerry Seinfeld's apartment number (on the show) is 5A. In the old episodes it was 3A.

The life span of a taste bud is ten days.

Pi has been calculated to 2,260,321,363 digits.

The billionth digit in Pi is 9.

The first 100 numbers of Pi are:

3.141592653589793238462643383279502884...

58209749445923078164062862089986280348...

Click HERE for 99,999 digits of pi!

A stretched out Slinky is 87 feet long.

An iguana can stay under water for 28 minutes.

Emus can't walk backwards.

A group of unicorns is called a blessing.

A group of kangaroos is called a mob.

A group of whales is called a pod.

A group of geese is called a gaggle.

A group of owls is called a parliament.

A group of ravens is called a murder.

A group of bears is called a sleuth.

12 or more cows is called a flink.

A baby oyster is called a spat.

Chickens can't swallow while they are upside down.

In the October 22, 1945 edition of Life magazine there was a picture of a chicken with its head cut off. It was alive too!

The average garden variety caterpillar has 248 muscles in its head.

Pinocchio was made of pine.

The largest pumpkin weighed 377 lbs.

A mule won't sink in quicksand but a donkey will.

More people are killed annually by donkeys than in airplane crashes.

Alfred Hitchcock had no belly button for it was eliminated during surgery.

There are 22 stars in the Paramount logo.

The average human produces 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime.

A quarter has 119 grooves around the edge.

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

Cranberry Jell-0 is the only kind that contains real fruit.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

Every time you lick a stamp you consume 1/10 of a calorie.

The pound sign # is called anoctothorpe.

Maine is the toothpick capital of the world.

New Jersey has a spoon museum with over 5,400 spoons from almost all the states.

There was once a town in West Virginia called "6".

Singapore only has one train station.

The parking meter was invented in North Dakota.

Napolean made his battle plans in a sandbox.

Roman Emperor Caligula made his horse a senator.

The green stuff on the occasional freak potatoe chip is chlorophyll.

If you ate too many carrots you would turn orange.

Pluto's orbit crosses Neptune's making Pluto the eighth planet from the sun. It has been that way since 1979 and will remain that way until 1999.

The earth is approx. 6,588,000,000,000,000,000 tons.

The force of 1 billion people jumping at the same time is equal to 500 tons of TNT.

Popeye was 5'6".

Howdy Doody had 48 freckles.

The first word spoken on the moon was "Okay".

Neil Armstrong stepped on the moon with his left foot first.

The average speed of Heinz ketchup leaving the bottle is 25 miles per year.

Hilary Clinton once said We are the President.

The percent of women who wash their hands after leaving a restroom is 80%.

The percent of men who wash their hands after using a restroom is 55%.

There are 333 toilet paper squares on a toilet paper roll.

The Eifel Tower has 2,500,000 rivets in it.

"Jaws" is the most common name for a goldfish.

On an average work day, a typist's fingers travel 12.6 miles.

The average American eats 2 donuts a day.

The longest word in the Old Testament is Malhershalahashbaz.

The longest time a person has been in a coma is 37 years.

Every minute in the U.S 6 people turn 17.

It takes the Where's Waldo artist one month to complete a drawing.

2500 lefties die each year using products designed for righties.

A baby is born every 7 seconds.

10 tons of space dust fall on the Earth everyday.

On average, a 4 year old child asks 437 questions a day.

Blue and white are the most common school colors.

Swimming pools in Phoenix, Arizona, pick up 20 pounds of dust a year.

The first message tapped by Samuel Morse over his invention the telegraph was: What hath God wrought?.

The first words spoken by over Alexander Bell over the telephone were: Watson, please come here. I want you.

The first words spoken by Thomas Edison over the phonograph were: Mary had a little lamb

The three words in the English language with the letters uu are: vacuum, residuum and continuum.

A baby in Florida was named: Truewilllaughinglifebuckyboomermanifestd... His middle name is George James.

It is illegal to ride a street car on Sunday if have been eating garlic in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

In a normal life time an American will eat 200 pounds of peanuts and 10,000 pounds of meat.

A new book is published every 13 minutes in America.

America's best selling ice-cream flavour is vanilla.

American's eat 18 billion hot dogs a year.

American's eat 134 pounds of sugar a year.

Every year the sun loses 360 million tons.

Because of Animal Crackers, many kids until they reach the age of ten, believe a bear is as tall as a giraffe.

You can tell if a skunk is about if you smell only .000 000 000 000 071 ounce of its spray.

Animal breeders in Russia once claimed to have bred sheep with blue wool.

Penguins are the only bird that can leap into the air like porpoises.

India has 50 million monkeys.

By some unknown means, an iguana can end its own life.

Americans spend around $3 billion for cat and dog food a year.

Pigs can cover a mile in 7.5 minutes when running at top speed.

You breathe about 10 million times a year.

The colder the room you sleep in, the better the chances are that you'll have a bad dream.

The first non-human to win an Oscar was Mickey Mouse.

Lee Harvey Oswald was booked with mugshot number 54018.

The Gulf Stream could carry a message in a bottle at an average of 4 miles per hour.

The bullseye on a dartboard must be 5 feet 8 inches off the ground.

The foot is the most common body part bitten by insects.

The most common time for a wake up call is 7am.

The doorbell was invented in 1831.

The are 255 squares on a Scrabble board.

The electric shaver was patented on November 6, 1928.

There are 500 sheets of paper in a ream.

The monkey wrench was invented by Charles Moncke.

Japan is the largest exporter of frog's legs.

There are seven points on the Statue of Liberty's crown.

There are approx. 550 hairs in the eyebrow.

The most common non-contagious disease in the world is tooth decay.

The shell constitutes 12 percent of an egg's weight.

A squid has 10 tentacles.

A snail's reproductive organs are in its head.

A cow's only sweat glands are in its nose.

The word "AND" appears 46,277 times in the Bible.

The first word played in the Scrabble rules demonstration game is "horn".

The telephone's U.S. patent number is 174,465.

The typical person goes to the bathroom 6 times a day.

There are 17 steps leading up to Sherlock Holme's apartment.

When a horned toad is angry, it squirts blood from it's eyes.

Napoleon was terrified of cats.

The first Lifesaver flavor was peppermint.

The typical American eats 263 eggs a year.

The ballpoint pen was invented in 1938 by Laszlo and Georg Biro.

The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger.

The parking meter was invented by C.C. Magee in 1935.

In 1961, an IBM 7090 computer calculated Pi to 100 265 digits.

The human body weighs forty times more than the brain.

After eating too much, your hearing is less sharp.

A person swallows approximately 295 times while eating dinner.

The oldest known vegetable is the pea.

Jack is the most common name in nursery rhymes.

The avocado has the most calories of any fruit.

The first zoo in the USA was in Philadelphia.

The letter N ends all Japanese words not ending in a vowel.

France has the highest per capita consumption of cheese.

The hardest bone in the human body is the jawbone.

4000 people are injured by teapots each year.

The typical American consumes 27 pounds of cheese each year.

The shortest English word that contains the letters A, B, C, D, E, and F is feedback.

The ostrich has a 46 foot long small intestine.

The state of California raises the most turkeys out of all of the states.

The most sensitive finger on the human hand is the index finger.

George Washington Carver invented peanut butter.

The typical hen lays 19 dozen eggs a year.

Stainless stell was invented by Harry Brearley in 1913.

A scallop has 35 blue eyes.

The left leg of a chicken in more tender than the right one.

The only dog that doesn't have a pink tongue is the chow.

Iceland was the first country to legalize abortion in 1935.

The giraffe has the highest blood pressure of any animal.

The dumbest domesticated animal is the turkey.

Russia has the most movie theaters in the world.

Albert Blake Dick invented the mimeograph machine.

The strongest muscle in the human body is the tongue.

The most fatal car accidents occur on Saturday.

An Oscar weighs seven pounds.

It takes the typical person seven minutes to fall asleep.

Gabriel Fahrenheit invented the mercury thermometer.

The Eiffel Tower has 1792 steps.

The mongoose was barred live entry into the U.S. in 1902.

Ants stretch when they wake up in the morning.

Thomas Edison, lightbulb inventor, was afraid of the dark.

About 3000 years ago, most Egyptians died by the time they were 30.

A sneeze travels out your mouth at over 600 m.p.h.

The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year.

Lightning strikes about 6,000 times per minute on this planet.

Owls are the only birds who can see the color blue.

A jellyfish is 95 percent water.

The elephant is the only mammal that can't jump.

The penguin is the only bird who can swim, but not fly.

America once issued a 5-cent bill.

Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.

Fortune cookies were actually invented in America, in 1918, by Charles Jung.

A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue.

Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.

Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails.

You blink about 84,000,000 times a year.

In England, in the 1880's, "Pants" was considered a dirty word.

A toothpick is the object most often choked on by Americans.

Every 45 seconds, a house catches on fire in the United States.

The sun is 330,330 times larger than the earth.

A hummingbird weighs less than a penny.

A cockroach will live nine days without it's head, before it starves to death.

The most used letter in the English alphabet is 'E', and 'Q' is the least used.

Dogs and cats, like humans, are either right of left handed... or is that pawed?

The opposite sides of a dice cube always add up to seven.

Men are 6 times more likely to be struck by lighting than women.

Of all the words in the English language, the word set has the most definitions.

Bulls are colorblind, therefore will usually charge at a matador's waving cape no matter what color it is -- be it red or neon yellow.

Apples are more efficient than caffeine in keeping people awake in the mornings.

Smelling bananas and/or green apples (smelling, not eating) can help you lose weight.

After eating, a housefly regurgitates its food and then eats it again!

When someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and whack them in the head.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

Hong Kong has the most Rolls Royce's per capita.

Alaska is the state with highest percent of people who walk to work.

28 percent of Africa is wilderness.

38 percent of America is wilderness.

A duck's quack does not echo and no one knows why.

It costs $6400 to raise a medium size dog to age of 11.

Average number of people airborne over the U.S. during any given hour: 61,000.

70 percent of Americans who visited Disneyland/World.

Intelligent people have more copper and zinc in their hair.

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

Iceland consumes more Coca-Cola per capita than any other country.

The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog." uses every letter in the alphabet and was developed by Western Union to test telex/twx communications.

Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.

The San Francisco Cable cars are the only "mobile" National Monuments.

The only 15-letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter "uncopyrightable."

Did you know that there are coffee flavored PEZ?

The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and learned how to walk up standard staircases.

When opossums are playing 'possum, they are not "playing." They actually pass out from sheer terror.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because, when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of unwanted people (without killing them) used to burn their houses down - hence the expression "to get fired."

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.

David Prowse was the guy in the Darth Vader suit in Star Wars. He spoke all of Vader's lines, and didn't know his voice was going to be dubbed over by James Earl Jones until he saw the screening of the movie.

The Pentagon, in Arlington, Virginia, has twice as many bathrooms as is necessary. When it was built in the 1940s, the state of Virginia still had segregation laws requiring separate toilet facilities for blacks and whites.

The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth II, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel fuel that it burns.

The highest point in Pennsylvania is lower than the lowest point in Colorado.

Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.

No NFL team which plays its home games in a domed stadium has ever won a Superbowl.

The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League All-star Game.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Pound for pound, hamburgers cost more than new cars.

The 3 most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.

Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.

In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world's nuclear weapons combined.

Reno, Nevada is west of Los Angeles, California.

The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

On average people fear spiders more than they do death.

You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

You are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider.

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.

In ancient Egypt, Priests plucked every hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

A cat's urine glows under a blacklight.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Coca Cola was originally green.

The Ten Commandments contain 297 words.

The Bill of Rights is stated in 463 words.

Lincoln's Gettysburg Address contains 266 words.

A recent federal directive to regulate the price of cabbage contains 26,911 words.

There are more collect calls made on Father's Day than on any other day.

Every day more money is printed for monopoly than the US Treasury.

Men can read smaller print than women, women can hear better than men.

Barbie's measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33.

The world's youngest parents were 8 %26amp; 9 and lived in China in 1910.

Honey is the only food that doesn't spoil

Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of their birthplace.

The youngest Pope was 11 years old.

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

The nursery rhyme Ring Around the Rosey is a rhyme about the bubonic plague. Infected people with the plague would get red circular sores (Ring around the Rosey...). These sores would smell very bad so people would hide flowers on their bodies in an attempt to mask the smell ("pocket full of posies..."). People who died from the plague would be burned to reduce the spread of the disease ("ashes, ashes, we all fall down").

The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicated the direction of the bubbles.

Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.

American car horns beep in the tone of F.

No piece of paper can be folded more than 7 times.

1 in every 4 Americans has appeared on television.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother's first flight.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."

The 57 on the Heinz ketchup bottle represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

Want to know 336 useless facts?
Not really.... : )

"Pluto's orbit crosses Neptune's making Pluto the eighth planet from the sun. It has been that way since 1979 and will remain that way until 1999." ... seriously did it take you more than 8 years to type that all out??? lol

And what do you mean no piece of paper can be folded seven times????

I typed this entire sentance with just my left hand: trixtadextaphobia.

This entire one was typed by just my right hand: stewardesses.

Sir Thomas Crapper was a royal plumber but he did not invent the toilet.

That a goldfish's attention-span/memory is only three seconds is actually urban myth.

What about "I'm."?

My dogs' parents were all less than 8 years old.

Some men are blind, some women deaf.

Etc. etc. etc....

However, if you listed about 400 things I do believe that 336 of them might honestly be worthless fact.
Reply:hey one thing you forgot to mention was....

3 of the things are listed twice each.

so technically you didnt even write as many useless facts as you thought ... but i was still saved from boredom for about 5 minutes. Report Abuse

Reply:HOW IN THE WORD DID YOU GET THIS ALL TO FIT ON ONE THING without putting: "additional details?!?!?!?!" Report Abuse

Reply:i meant world Report Abuse

Reply:I LIKE TURTLES!!!! Report Abuse

Reply:Despite urban legend, Crapper did not invent the flush toilet. Few other urban legends in there too Report Abuse

Reply:awesome man,thanks for posting! Report Abuse

Reply:The TV show Mythbusters proved you can fold paper more than 7 times.The paper must be VERY thin and big. They reference a girl who did it as a school project. She folded 1/4 mile of toilet paper ~13 times. Mythbusters did a HUGE sheet of paper and got either 13 or 28 times. Report Abuse

Reply:Mythbusters also proved goldfish can be trained to go through a maze to find food. So the 3-second memory is also false. Report Abuse

Reply:'m headin over russia ^^ :PP Report Abuse

Reply:wow i actually read all those but not all are correct.

i can type stwerdesses with both of my hand Report Abuse

Reply:Also, "Go" is the shortest sentence in the English language, because the subject is implied as "you" and the verb is "Go"

Not "I am" Report Abuse

Reply:he means that any piece of paper can't be folded in HALF 7 times. believe me i trided alot of times Report Abuse

Reply:i love friends Report Abuse

Reply:Did you know that the word count for all of that was 3,985 wordss, Report Abuse

Reply:carrots turn u yellow not orange if u gorge on carrots and tomatoes then ur orange also i red them all post more Report Abuse

Reply:Actually, women do not blink twice as much as men. I have tested this, and men blink more than women. Report Abuse

Reply:stfu ! xD Report Abuse

Reply:I saw that mythbusters where they folded the paper. It was in fact more than 7 times. But the paper they used was extremely large. Interesting facts, it gave me something to do though some are false. Report Abuse

Reply:I WOUD NOT SIT THEIR AND READ ALL THAT Report Abuse

Reply:...And to really think someone would sit there and read all of that.
Reply:What is so interesting is that I knew at least half of these already.
Reply:very interesting, u make it hard to get two points-haha